Breaking the Fourth Wall

I’m doing a tour in September to promote the release of my new special, “Infect Me Once.” So far we have 20 cities booked, quite a few 1st time stops. It starts September 4th in New York City. This is the audience from the night I taped it. This was before I even gave them weed!

On my last tour, as some of you remember, I bought a $200 wooden duck in Bentonville, Arkansas while under the influence. He’s still doing ok. I think he’s going to come with me on my new tour this September. I’ll announce the dates on 4/20. But it starts September 4th, in NYC!

a father/son combo just told me to go fuck myself while playing call of duty online and i wasn’t even mad because they’re already bonding this early on a Sunday.

You should hang letters from the ceiling and make her do tricks through them

I’ve never performed in Maine before but in one week I’ll be at the Laugh Shack in Portland, Maine. I think weed is popular in those parts, come to the show and let’s find out together my friends.

One week from today I’ll be at @ShaskeenComedy in Manchester, New Hampshire. Doors at 8, show start at 9. Tickets are $5 at the door. One of the most fun rooms in the country, shall we party? Yes we shall.

I don’t like that a presidential candidate just announced they’re running. I think they should have to give us a prom-posal level of show. Cover my car with sticky notes and ask me to vote for you dammit.

my bucket list and this audience members bucket list couldn't have been more different, but it made for an entertaining conversation

This #UFCPhoenix card doesn’t need weed to be better, but it’s certainly going to get smoked anyway

All I keep thinking about while watching Andrea Lee fight #UFCPhoenix

I recently realized that it’s been so long since I’ve been to the gym, that I’m not even sure if the equipment I’m lying about using still exists.

I’m on the road and just stoned enough to enjoy the familiar feel of an unfamiliar mattress. This room has a clock. The high ceiling acts as a megaphone being held to the clocks tick. Then my brain jumps to Kesha’s song, “Tik Tok.” How I wish I could focus on that clock again.

Yo and I just realized it’s the ginger wall. Just me and @RealCarrotTop.

This is awesome. When I was a teenager, @ZaniesChicago was the first club on the road to pass me. It really holds a special place in the memories of my career. Last week I taped my special there. Now this poster is hanging in the greenroom of the club. This is better than weed.

Most of my act is just about skittles

I have no words to express the love I have for the folks who spent their Saturday night with me taping my first special. Zanies has always been a home but it felt even warmer tonight. My old man flew in for the day just to share the moment with me as well. This is pure happiness.

I’m recording a new album in a week. It’s a fun way to celebrate turning 24, recording your second album. To make things more fun, we’re also going to shoot it as a special. 4 shows at @zaniesrosemont & 2 shows @ZaniesChicago. First tapings are January 25th, let’s pack it out!

The one part of adulthood I didn’t really expect was how comfortable you become with just crying.

“Dude don’t you care that your neighbor is a cop?” Me-“...”

In a shocking turn of events, my mom is now joining my dad as an avid listener of Joe Rogan’s podcast. Watch them fuck around and make me a big brother at 24 years old because they got too high on DMT.