I nominate @Andy to moderate the second presidential debate; only he has the experience needed to keep control of this shitshow.
You know your lady times are imminent when you are literally googling "please God is there someone who can deliver me McDonalds"
Ok i get its a thing 4 #vsfs models to show off their abs but like who the eff is casually making all these tube tops anymore it's not 1998
People 55+ on trump: "we voted 4 him bc hes a DC outsider" on Millenials: "they all think they can be CEO they need to pay their dues" mkay
"...and that's why I'm not allowed back" -me, ending every story ever. #bugirlproblems
There were 8 fries on my plate before I went to the bathroom and 6 when I came back, so yeah, check please, this date is over.
If someone told you you could either have a boyfriend or a glass of wine, which would you choose? White or red?
My FB newsfeed has officially transitioned from weddings 2 babies meanwhile I'm still single AF if you don't count wine #postbugirlproblems
Walking down Mt Auburn in broad daylight like "it doesn't look like much now, but this is where shit goes down" 🍾
How did every1 decide Italy is the trendy honeymoon of choice ty? Meanwhile Im Insta stalking drinking $9 wine from TJs-upgraded from the $3
