Bread

Houses are burning down in my neighborhood and little kids are trying to catch the falling ashes in buckets to sell for new gold teeth, what a shame of a society we live in

I traveled through time and all I could do is make violins looks really fucking stupid in the future

The only reason Japan is like that is because of all the kotobuki bullshit

They replaced all the chairs in this library with new ones that stimulate your prostate as you read. I'm currently reading the Quran and hoo boy

You guys better be aware of the new disease going around where you heard the refreshing sound of soda poured into a glass whenever you think too much

You just got diagnosed with intestinitis, what else are you going to do?

We are all living in the time between our androgyny, we wake up as bags of marshmallow and we go to sleep as bags of wrinkle

They started 3D printing toenails for sustainability reasons and they say they taste just like the real thing but I'm not too sure :\

I'm gonna keep ramming my knees into this table until it hurts

We're all animals. A dog will drink out of a puddle but we think our weak immune systems are too good for that anymore

The secret to winning tic tac toe is to pick toe every time

The city man is shredding my lettuce

It always comforts me to remember that radio waves are always coursing through my body and vibrating me just a little bit, imperceptibly changing the shape of my body constantly

If you ever see me trying to escape a pit of quicksand then please push me back in, it's what I would have wanted

You can just hold some water in your mouth all day and never swallow it, no one can stop you lol

I've got god in my heart but the devil in my head and in my glutes

I'm really only sitting here sulking in the park in hopes that some girl on tiktok will do one of those "give a random sad person a sandwich" videos

I was really doubting it in the beginning, but when I go into Vape City they actually managed to fit an entire vape themed city inside that strip mall lot

If you're a homophobia, you're gonna get dome-opohibia-ed

Listen here motherfucker if I have to listen to you talk on and on about the "banana wars" ever again I'm going to have to report you to the meanie police