If anyone is shopping for my Christmas gift, I am a size Chick-fil-A gift card

If the government can shut down, so can I

HOW IS THIS BROUGHT TO US BY CALM

I don’t even know how I communicated before the “🙂‍↔️” emoji

Me tryna convince my friends to sign up for a travel credit card so we can see the world for free

I’m not sure if a Coke Zero and a chicken sandwich will save me but I’m willing to try

Candy corn is the Crocs of candy

Not once has anyone dropped me their number as they floated by my table and I am personally appalled

me when someone’s camping in the left lane

I am once again asking that we stop normalizing Disney adults

Every Christmas I wake up and am thankful I’m not in a “matching Christmas pajamas” family

Bad news for iced coffees, I woke up

It’s October 1 which basically means Halloween is tomorrow, Thanksgiving is next week, and Christmas is the weekend to follow

not me wondering how all the wordle people are doing now that they don’t post every day

If I text you “🇳🇴” it means there’s Nor Way I’ll Turn Down More Coffee

I am overdue for some chicken nuggets

i am a grown, educated adult and i still do not understand NFTs

happy father’s day to these three guys and these three guys only

If my calculations are correct, I’m 100% in the mood for another iced coffee

me each morning before coffee

Mask this Mask that When will someone m-ask me out on a date