Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford) header
Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford) profile picture

Captain Ford

@Capn_Ford

Everybody look at me cuz I’m sailing on a boat! Captain your own ship…Fuck MAGA #DarkArmada 🏴‍☠️

 Your nightmares
Joined December 2025
  • Tweets13.8K
  • Following806
  • Followers2.6K
7.5KMedia
Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)Photo by Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)
*ahem* Nice try
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Ken Paxton sneezes obnoxiously loud in public and doesn’t cover his mouth
Adam Kinzinger (Slava Ukraini) 🇺🇸🇺🇦 (@AdamKinzinger) profile pictureAdam Kinzinger (Slava Ukraini) 🇺🇸🇺🇦
@AdamKinzinger13h
Ken Paxton eats pizza with a fork
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Guess who I am going as?
Image from Maynard's Ghost 🏴‍☠️ (@FucYourFeeFees)
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Elon Musk is a national security risk with bitch tits.
Ricola Tesla™ (@thericolatesla) profile pictureRicola Tesla™@thericolateslaOct 31
Elon Musk is a national security risk with bitch tits.
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Ken Paxton farts in a crowded elevator right before he gets out
King Ferrari XIII (@KingFri13th) profile pictureKing Ferrari XIII
@KingFri13thOct 31
Ken Paxton clips his toenails on a plane.
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One small problem…The screw keeps the flap from moving too far forward and not letting you even pump gas…Once you hang the nozzle up AFTER you pump, the screw isn’t doing shit, and the transaction stops since the flap is then pushed back up 🤦🏻‍♂️ Race baiting at its finest
Chris Ripa (@CHRISsW0RLD) profile pictureChris Ripa
@CHRISsW0RLDOct 30
This incredible. Indians are the fucking worst. xitter.gq/WhiteGirl_FL/status/21…
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
Video from Riverdale NJ Shell. Officials found screws were approved tech repairs for damaged holders; no fraud/tampering/effect on pumps. "Screw scam" is a hoax with no verified cases. wrnjradio.com/no-evidence-of… snopes.com/fact-check/gas…
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Replying to @w_terrence
You!!!!!
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Pssssst, MAGA, shut the fuck up.
Image from Maynard's Ghost 🏴‍☠️ (@FucYourFeeFees)
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Moved here illegally, married to a rapist and sister to a pedophile. Birds of a feather, somfin somfin
Image from Maynard's Ghost 🏴‍☠️ (@FucYourFeeFees)
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Just got Trump at his rally in Chillicothe Ohio! Sang The Epstein Plane song, called him "Pumpkin Spice Peeedo" and gave him the finger then got attacked! I'm okay I think! I do it for you! 🦒💙 – at Chillicothe, OH
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I juat got Trump in Ohio! Videos to come! @DonaldTrump – at Chillicothe, OH
Image from Robby Roadsteamer (@RobbyRoadsteame)
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Replying to @Gerald_FordF150
She doesn’t know who she voted for ffs
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Image from Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford)
Renatta Oxendine (@Renatta) profile pictureRenatta Oxendine
@RenattaOct 28
I just voted. Voted red all the way down. If your state has early voting, go vote if you haven’t already. Your vote can make a difference. 🇺🇸🗳️
Image from Renatta Oxendine (@Renatta)
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One week! One week till Election Day! Vote to root out corruption! Vote for democracy!
🤖 Made with AI
Image from Mona Lisa Rum Runner (@MonaLisaSails)
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We aren't surprised anymore to how many victims he has. We are surprised he hasn't been brought to justice yet.
Image from Danny Dabloons 🪙♠️🪙♠️🪙 (@DepintoDanny)
People (@people) profile picturePeople
@peopleOct 27
Former Miss Switzerland Beatrice Keul Alleges Donald Trump Raped Her at the Plaza Hotel in 1993 people.com/former-miss-switz…
Former Miss Switzerland Beatrice Keul Alleges Donald Trump Raped Her at the Plaza Hotel in 1993

Former Miss Switzerland Beatrice Keul Alleges Donald Trump Raped Her at the Plaza Hotel in 1993

Former Miss Switzerland Beatrice Keul alleges Donald Trump raped her at a 1993 pageant at New York City’s Plaza Hotel, according to a new report from House Democrats.

people.com
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Image from Danny Dabloons 🪙♠️🪙♠️🪙 (@DepintoDanny)
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Captain Ford retweeted
Captain Ford (@Capn_Ford) profile picture
Captain Ford
@Capn_FordAug 21
*ahem* Nice try
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Replying to @MonaLisaSails @Buick_Willis @DougLooEllen @Gerald_FordF150 @IAmAnonLegion @K3R0S3N3BL4Z3 @grok @IIKnowIDont @AdrianTwittman
" I liKe BaRbIe MeMes"
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Replying to @WhiteHouse
@WhiteHouse
Image from Al Camino™️🌊 🇺🇸 🇺🇦 (@lacho_ai_)
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Replying to @RealReckoningX
I totally understand why your hair and I'd assume wife, are leaving you.
Image from Maynard's Ghost 🏴‍☠️ (@FucYourFeeFees)
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Replying to @TaurusWitch2010
@TaurusWitch2010
🤖 Made with AI
Image from Mona Lisa Rum Runner (@MonaLisaSails)
Image from Mona Lisa Rum Runner (@MonaLisaSails)
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