Coach Mistretta

WHAT IF HOMEWORK IS TAKING AWAY THE VERY THINGS CHILDREN NEED TO LEARN? Think about it. A child spends 7 hours at school. They come home tired, overwhelmed, and ready for a break. And what do we give them? More schoolwork. But here’s what research tells us: SLEEP helps the brain process information and strengthen memories. MOVEMENT supports attention, learning, and emotional regulation. FAMILY TIME builds connection, security, and emotional well-being. PLAY develops creativity, problem-solving, and social skills. EXPLORING NATURE encourages discovery, observation, and wonder. CURIOSITY fuels motivation, deeper thinking, and a love of learning. DOWNTIME gives children opportunities to recharge, reflect, and just be kids. These aren’t rewards children should have to earn AFTER finishing homework. They’re essential parts of growing up. Now, I’m not against homework. Meaningful homework can reinforce learning and build independence. But research suggests its academic benefits are generally greater for older students than younger children. Here’s the question we should be asking: IS THE HOMEWORK WORTH WHAT CHILDREN ARE GIVING UP TO COMPLETE IT? If a child understands a concept after 5 math problems, why assign 25? If homework takes one child 20 minutes and another child with ADHD, anxiety, or a learning disability 2 hours, is that fair? If homework means sacrificing sleep, family time, friendships, or simply being a kid, shouldn’t we rethink what we’re doing? MORE WORK DOESN’T ALWAYS MEAN MORE LEARNING. So here’s my challenge: TEACHERS, PRINCIPALS & CURRICULUM COORDINATORS: Examine homework expectations. Is every assignment meaningful? Could fewer problems accomplish the same goal? Are we prioritizing learning or simply assigning more work? SUPERINTENDENTS & SCHOOL BOARDS: Review homework policies. Are they supported by research? Do they account for students’ mental health, developmental needs, and family lives? PARENTS: Track how much time homework actually takes. Notice the impact on sleep, stress, and family time. Share what you discover with your school. And let’s remember something important. A child riding a bike, exploring the woods, catching fireflies, building with LEGOs, asking a million questions, creating something, laughing with friends, or spending time with family IS LEARNING. Not all learning happens at a desk. Not all growth can be measured by a grade. And not every valuable childhood experience comes with an assignment. CHILDREN NEED A GREAT EDUCATION. BUT THEY ALSO DESERVE A CHILDHOOD. What would happen if we cut homework in HALF but made every assignment twice as meaningful?

MASLOW BEFORE BLOOM ISN’T JUST FOR SCHOOLS. IT’S FOR LIFE. We often expect the people we love to think better, behave better, communicate better, work harder, and make better choices… when what they may need first is to simply feel safe, connected, understood, and supported. That’s the heart of “Maslow Before Bloom.” Abraham Maslow reminded us that basic human needs matter. Benjamin Bloom helped us understand how we learn, think, and grow. But here’s the part I believe we sometimes miss: Before we can expect the best FROM people, we need to help bring out the best IN people. And that starts at home. Here are 5 ways to practice Maslow Before Bloom with your family — and yourself: 1. Connect before you correct. Before the lecture, consequence, or advice, try: “Tell me what happened.” Feeling heard can lower defenses and open the door to problem-solving. 2. Regulate before you reason. A stressed brain isn’t great at listening, learning, or making good decisions. Sometimes the first intervention is food, water, sleep, movement, quiet, a hug, or simply a few minutes to reset. 3. Ask “What do you need?” before “What’s wrong with you?” Behavior is often communication. Get curious before getting frustrated. 4. Make home a safe place to fail. Celebrate effort, honesty, asking for help, trying again, and the courage to say, “I messed up.” Perfection doesn’t build resilient people. Safe opportunities to struggle and recover do. 5. Practice Maslow Before Bloom on YOURSELF. You cannot endlessly pour from an empty cup. Eat. Sleep. Move. Breathe. Connect with someone. Take the break. Ask for help. Give yourself the same patience you give everyone else. Your family doesn’t need a perfect parent, spouse, child, sibling, or grandparent. They need people who feel safe enough to be human, connected enough to be honest, and supported enough to keep growing. That’s Maslow Before Bloom. Not lowering expectations. Creating the conditions that make meeting those expectations possible. Try this today: Before correcting someone, fixing something, or pushing yourself harder, ask: “What need might need to be met first?” That one question can change a conversation, a relationship… and sometimes an entire day. — Dr. Bryan Pearlman Therapist • Former Principal/Teacher • Author of the Maslow & Bloom books If this made you think of someone, share it with them. And tell me in the comments: What does “Maslow Before Bloom” look like in your home? #MaslowBeforeBloom #MentalHealth #Parenting #Family #EmotionalWellness