Wry looker-at-er, satirist, comedy gig putter-on-er, dancer, litter campaigner, crisp historian, humanitarian, Brummie.
Joined March 2009
- Tweets2.4K
- Following1.7K
- Followers331
- Likes471
@sniffpetrol With reference to your new ink: On a recent trip to Wales, I spotted this remnant of bygone times.
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@VizTopTips
Ensure visiting defecators & micturators alike are aware of your status as a published Viz Top Tipster by simply buying frames from Tiger, before going to Max Spielmann to have them printed and framed then affixing them to the walls of the smallest room in the house.
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Golden Wonder Sausage and Tomato are the crisps that Walkers Sausage Sarnie wish they could've been.
There. I said it.
@GoldenWonderUK
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@DeeringRob I may have imagined it, but did you get your Seann and your Sean mixed up?
We don't miss Seann Walsh. He's still around..
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@KPSnacks
I wait a lifetime for irregularly shaped Hula Hoops, and two turn up at once.
I feel like my whole life has been leading up to this moment.
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@bbcshowstours Hi. I've not received tickets for the This Town premiere on Tuesday 19th. I've received a text, but no tickets. Can someone resend please?
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@CooperativeBank Huge wait times on phone services, and now the mobile app down. Plenty of other banks are able to perform these services well, and it's to one of these banks which I'll be moving to, after c. 20 years with Co-Op.
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@CooperativeBank
An hour waiting for an answer, and counting. The recorded message stated an hour, because of above average waiting times. They're always 'above average'. That isn't how averages work. I'm going elsewhere.
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From chart-topper to reality TV star, via Jordan husband and baby father, to switching on the Christmas lights in Redditch, Peter Andre's career trajectory is remarkable.
And I mean with that with the utmost disrespect, to both him, and the people of Redditch.
Hope that helps.
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When Robbie Williams is interviewed wearing his pants, people love it.
When I do it, I don't get the job.
One rule for one...
#RobbieWilliams
@BBC6Music Robert Plant pork pie. Not sausages, but I presented him with a pork pie and a jar of mustard at his 70th birthday party.
Hope that helps.
Craig Pullen
Birmingham.
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@CooperativeBank
I’m getting mixed messages here. Mobile App Unavailable, but it’s working as usual?
It exists simultaneously in both states?
Schrodinger’s app?
Your uptime is less than optimal, and I’m out of patience.
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@Carpervert Saw this Micra being used as a lawn in Birmingham.
There's a pun in there somewhere, but I'm very, very tired.
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@OOCSmithSniff
Saw this Micra being used as a flower bed in Birmingham. Not sure if this constitutes abuse. There's probably some good puns to make, but I'm very, very tired.
From Craig Pullen
Birmingham.
If this track was any more old school, it could be said to be emblematic of decades of Government underfunding.
youtu.be/zMfXFLZUJ6E?si=pYrz…
#oldschool
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