the world isn't ready for me #TheGentlemanUnleashed

if you wait until the lane is about to end to merge we are torturing your balls in hell

had no idea trisha paytas was married to hila klein's brother she no longer speaks to this is all basically crusader kings

i understand the concept of picking up your infant and smelling their butt however seeing it without warning in public is crazy

mr jangle I dearly missed you

sat next to a baby on this flight and it was so quiet the entire time which makes the rest of the flight babies look bad why aren't they all like this

you don't need a neck pillow on a two hour flight #GrowUp

i love the multiple signs at airports informing you not to bring your gun through security

coolest bag on this dogshit frontier flight has to go to me

i'm glad all the airlines for us poors have wildly different personal item size standards actually

$400 world series tickets on resale rn who's trying to take a tampa trip and maybe visit hulk hogan's sports bar too

if harry kane doesn't win the ballon d'or the voters are clearly biased against weird looking guys

one of my quirkiest thrift hauls

those glade plug-in scent things aren't edible i took the bullet and gave it a shot so you don't have to

yeah fuck it let me get the $2 good mythical morning nightlight

my goodwill seemingly removed the glass case and sells all that stuff online now so i will be leading a siege of goodwill soon dm me if you know how to use a trebuchet

we're all gonna doodoo ourselves eventually so you might as well start early and get good at it