𝗕𝗮𝗿𝘁 ''𝙄𝙢𝙥𝙪𝙡𝙨𝙚'' 𝗔𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗻

┎ ⠀⠀𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘚𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘦 𝘚𝘺𝘯𝘢𝘱𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘰𝘳𝘺. ⠀⠀𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘶𝘪𝘯𝘦 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀┚

It means I'm not horny, I'm a man without horns. Just hair.

how is that good it means you'll die

"No thank you, I'd rather just go back into the simulation, Elon."

Is it just me, or does Eobard look like the guy who ruined the blue bird app?

That's creepy. You're creepy.

Then what is it? If it's not tech or slime or goop. I keep trying but we both get impatient.

Goop? I don't think he likes a lot of technology. He's not very good at texts.

You're not allowed to use slime either. To be fair, he didn't actually say that, I just thought that it made it sound a little more legit. Max probably said it, though.

If you use technology to make me go slow then that's cheating, Grandpa Barry said so.

I don't have horns I have hair

That's a lot smarter but it still has the problem of me being crazy fast.

It comes before Feb but after Dec

That's impossible, I'm too fast! And headbutts don't make sense, your head is sensitive, why would you use it as a weapon? What if you miss and hurt your teeth, or they have a metal plate in their head?

smoking will make you wheeze when you backflip

... Daylocity.

Velociday

I promise I'll only sit and kick my legs if we can get milkshakes and fries. Lots of fries. I'm really hungry.

YOU MERELY ADOPTED THE SIMULATION I WAS BORN IN IT MOULDED—

I WANT MILKSHAKES. DINER HAS MILKSHAKES.