If this is a common enough problem, I question why you let men become friends with you in the first place "I want male friends because they're good people and-," I don't believe you, frankly. Preemptive clauses like this are more something fitting for the world of law or business, not friendship Telling someone you've just been acquainted with that you'd never date them is basically a slap in the face if they haven't asked. You presume that they will ask and rather than signal lack of interest in other ways, you slap them before they even get the chance. "No matter the way your brain is wired, no matter how I may seem to you, no matter what qualities you may find attractive to me in the future, I will never entertain romance with you. Nice to meet you, friend" This is not something that normal people do. Most people handle confessions as they happen so as to give the other person a semblance of decency for the act itself. If you are in the oh-so painful position of consistently getting suitors, I would just avoid the situation entirely. If, despite all this, you still insist on having male "friends," it sounds like you're looking for sources of attention, just not affection In your own words, if you did want someone to be a source of affection, the "boundaries can be reshaped based on both peoples feelings." You then say that you would respect someone not pursuing you based on the initial no-dating boundary, and thus make the rules unclear to the exceptions and preemptively shoot yourself in the foot. And you wonder why so many men are just frustrated with the dating game entirely and are just bowing out of relationships of any sort with women, romantic or not