Judgemental Jesus

Good Friday? Fuck you. #ihateyouall

Jesus Loves The Little Children is a horrible religious song because it makes me sound like a pedophile. Fuck you Christianity.

I am always watching.

Jesus was well know for racial profiling.

Mondays are basically just Satan teabagging you in the face for 24 hours straight.

Everybody is talking about Justin Bieber, I'm just up here in heaven, watching everyone poop.

I took away the sins of the world. Wtf did you give me for my birthday you ungrateful people?

Happy Birthday to me bitches! I want all the titties this year. Jesus wakes up to pussy lined up under his tree every damn year.

They should totally Weekend At Bernie's the corpse of Paul Walker for Fast & Furious 27. #RIPPaulWalker

I hate that my birthday and Christmas are on the same day.

@Brandieatsdicks @is_anyone_up @Huntermoore less face, more ass

#LetsMakeItAwkward When I'm horny I like to fuck the stigmata holes in my hands. Shits tight.

@lilmiamilovin @Huntermoore 1973 called, they want their camera back

@bYaNKaZ @Huntermoore @is_anyone_up you put out at least once, and thats good enough for me

Church brand toilet seats, for when you have to take a holy shit.

I use stigmata in a sensual way.

#ThingsIGetAlot Sweet hand piercings bro

@dillestpickle @is_anyone_up @Huntermoore the whole face area really

#PerksOfDatingMe I turn water into wine bitch. Who doesn't like free wine?