αντίθεση

found christ, will update

☀️ 🌑 😽

when your vibrator dies mid too-long gooning session and you shouldve stopped 20 minutes ago and you lowkey say thank god

sorry i was chasing the baba yaga... i was hoping she would kidnap me but she decided i was more trouble than i was worth

i love me a Mr. "I don't need to see the price tag."

im getting skinny and hypermobile

every time your hourly alarm goes off and youre already up like SHUT UP BITCH I KNOW IM UP FYTB

i hope i have brain damage from compulsively choking myself during maladaptive hypersexual daydreams

ive taken note of all your moral failings and blind-spots and will be acting accordingly

oomf said you seem like you have an adult job based on the fact that you live in a house and have a wife and the privacy to be super freaky

my pull is silent and my vengeance is violent my reach teach things that a preacher cant preach

if only there was a kind of girl that was perpetually in puberty... 🤔 perhaps by means of some medical intervention? maybe even hormone replacement? has no one thought of this before? it really boggles the mind. alas, perhaps one day we shall be graced with such fanciful dreams.

lead stare, calcified pineal gland stare, stoner stare... what about my thousand yard stare

sound weird like fella with a hard r

if you only come to me when something is wrong im charging you a consultation fee