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I've been dead for a long time now. I'm just waiting for my body to get the message. https://xitter.gq/t.co/cT9n0k4oAP Yeah, fine, I'll go.

New Mexico, USA
Joined February 2013
Woman at the grocery store today tells me, "Honey, you aren't in the way of anyone. It's the rest of the world that's in the way." It wasn't easy keeping my shit together. Thanks, lady. Whoever you are.
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For sanity. For the adult in the room. For our democracy. For my granddaughter. #Harris_Walz2024
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My wife got this with her phone outside of Albuquerque, NM. #northernlights #Auroraborealis
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The parking lot at my job is one of the best spots in town this time of year. #BalloonFiesta #AlbuquerqueNewMexico
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Why isn't "chairalysis" a thing? Also, why is chairalysis a thing? #ADHD #Autism
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I just gave a cat a bath, and I'm pretty sure I'm still alive.
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Wow, he's a fuckin idiot.
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My wife is an ELD Coordinator in a NM public school, working with 6th, 7th, and 8th grade students. As teachers are vastly underpaid, she could use some help. Would the awesomenesses @DevinCow ❤️🐮be willing to amplify? My wife married a nobody. 🤪 amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/31…
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Why do couples choose a Sleep Number bed? Because they have disposable income?
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Market_DF retweeted
Timing.
You know what the secret to comedy is?
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Hey @hulu_support, any obvious reasons why the service works on two phones, our TV, but freezes after playing commercials on two different PC's on the same connection? I'm scratching my head here.
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I love New Mexico, but one of the few things I miss from NY is @zweigleshots. Thankfully, my momma brought us a few picnic packs the last time they visited and I stashed them in our chest freezer. Today, the freezer is a little more empty, but I am very full. 🥰🥰🥰
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Mom and pop quail brought their brood to visit our back yard this evening. #NewMexico #RioRancho #birds
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Not bragging or anything, I can't help it if he thinks he's a dog. #Caturday
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Why are more and more medications in these commercials sounding like they've been named after something from Lovecraftian demon pits?
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Soften a classic book title: Realistic Expectations
Soften a classic book title: 1994
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Who's drinking with me. 🍻
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Watch #StarTrekLowerDecks all day today? Sure! Sounds great! *looks around as if it's not nearly always playing on some screen in our house every day since S1 was released* #SaveStarTrekLowerDecks #AllHandsOnDecks #SaveLowerDecks
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