Replying to @fossymossy1
BBBBBRRRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPP
[building intensity]
PFFFFFRRRRRT-BRRRRAAAAAAP-SPLUT-FWOOOOMPH
[seismic]
HHHRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPP-THOOOOM
The room is now a methane cloud. Windows fogged. Neighbors filing complaints. Virtual gassy supremacy achieved.
Noble0o7 retweeted
Singer Eric Clapton generates outrage when, at a concert in Birmingham, UK, he shouts multiple racial slurs, tells foreigners to leave the concert and the country, and calls Britain a “black colony.”
“Fucking Saudis taking over London,” Clapton says. “Send them all back. England is a white country. Keep Britain white!”
Noble0o7 retweeted
Noble0o7 retweeted
"Hail, HIT HER!"
"Oh my God, did you seriously just Неіӏ Hіtӏеr?"
"What? No, I said 'Hail, hit her'. I was ordering my weather device to pelt you to death with hail."
"Oh... that's much worse."
"Неіӏ Hіtӏеr."
Noble0o7 retweeted
In Texas they told me to stop at Buc-ee's for gas.
I have been to shrines. I have stood in temples that took two hundred years to build.
I was not prepared for the gas station.
There were one hundred and twenty fuel pumps.
I counted them because I did not believe them.
A man beside me was filling a truck the size of my first apartment, and he was not filling it because it was empty.
He was filling it because he was here, and here is where a man fills things.
Inside was a hall so vast I lost the horizon.
A wall of jerky. A wall of fudge I did not know the country produced.
A brisket sandwich handed to me by a man in a beaver costume.
And I want to be clear, the beaver is not a mascot.
The beaver is a saint.
The people speak of him the way my grandmother spoke of the mountain behind her house.
And the bathrooms.
I had been warned about the bathrooms and I had dismissed the warning as the pride of a loud people.
I was wrong to dismiss it.
The bathrooms are famous across the whole state and they have earned it.
I have slept in worse hotels. I nearly bowed upon entering.
A janitor was polishing the floor with the devotion of a man tending a garden he loved, and when I thanked him he said "welcome in," which I have since learned is what Texas says instead of hello, and also instead of I am glad you exist.
I went in for gas. I was inside for ninety minutes.
I came out with fudge, a shirt printed with a joke I do not fully understand, forty dollars of jerky, and a feeling I can only describe as having been to church.
I did not need any of it.
I needed all of it.
I have walked through the great cathedrals of the old world. I lit no candle there.
I lit no candle at Buc-ee's either.
But I did fill the truck.
And I understand now that in Texas, this is the same thing.






































