『𝖒𝖈 𝖕𝖆𝖙』

Question for anyone who’s ever worked at Chipotle: I just watched a guy in the back use a spatula to chop what appeared to be a large block of pumice in half. What dat about

I was at karaoke last night and these parents brought their kid. We were talking about wrestling and he goes “Rhea Ripley’s my favorite!” I said “my man. Who’s your favorite male wrestler?” He goes “Sami Zayn!” I said “Sami Zayn sucks.” I hate Sami Zayn so much

I’m ngl I’m drunk™ rn but can dogs need/get LASIK

Yeah I don’t think Usopp really is Sniper King 😎

no fucking way this was my most popular tweet im kms

mmhmm sure man

the average dog cannot comprehend DST fucking up their feeding schedule

sweatiest match I’ve ever played. spent most of the round running trying to extract new sprites and getting hunted but I made it. side note: I really REALLY miss my portable extractors and cheat codes

Creatine coffee with the Buddy boy

Just said Merry Christmas to my neighbors as they’re taking down their Halloween stuff, they did not like that shit

The community note being added to what was obviously a joke tweet is very funny to me

I don’t know why I bought this. I knew it was going to taste like shit. Somehow it was worse. I’ve never been more annoyed by a drinks existence

they’re calling him the most butt rock Akatsuki to ever exist

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I asked pookie “is the fit tuff?” She said yes. Even Buddy knows I got that shit on