If Elon musk was born in NZ he would legit just own a pokies

Some of you silly fools hate on Ed Sheeran for being a zionist puppet. I, an enlightened man, hate on Ed Sheeran for being a whiny ginger. We are not the same

Shows coming up in Sydney and Melbourne seancolliercomedy.com

AUCKLAND! I am coming to your city TOMORROW for the @NZComedyFest My show is called SHITEGEIST and it’s about how THINGS ARE FUCKED Use use promo code “CHUR” for a 15% ticket discount (Also if you wanna come but can’t afford flick me a DM and I’ll give ya some comps) CHUR

PERTH!! I am coming to your beautiful city in just over a week to bring my BRAND NEW SHOW TO THE FRINGE!! link to tickets is on the fringe world website get amongst it x

How good are the pokies?

My newsfeed is all Taylor Swift, Trump and Gaza Man fuck this timeline

If Dostoevsky was alive today he wouldn’t be able to write crime and punishment because his friends would keep distracting him with reels

We should all start referring to covid as the plague

Crazy people celebrate mortgages. “I owe the bank 900k let’s have a dinner” get fucked mate

One of the most upsetting things about WW3 starting is that in the background you have Will Smith trying to launch a rap career at 56

I don’t read the news, But it doesn’t really help, Horror everywhere Another twitter haiku from the fucking DON

The peasants cannot revolt for they have too many notifications

Maturing is really just an elaborate process of realising that most bad things in the world can be directly traced back to Ronald Reagan

Farty poo

Just wanna be rich enough to afford YouTube premium

The real issue in this Presidential Election is who’s gonna free Young Thug and Joe Exotic

The two best films I’ve watched since 2020 have both starred Nicholas Cage.

Basketball is all luck

Nobody go see Napoleon film it’s awful