TitianRed

You can’t make this shit up.

Things the recovery industry will not tell you: 1. The drug worked. That is why people use it. Not weakness. Not moral failure. A neurological event so complete and persuasive that any honest account of addiction has to start there. The problem is not that the drug fails. The problem is that what it does is unrepeatable, and you will burn your entire life to the ground trying to get back to a place that no longer exists. 2. Shame is not guilt. Guilt says I did something bad. Shame says I am something bad. Guilt is appropriate. Shame is a cell with no windows. Most people use the words interchangeably. That mistake is lethal. 3. You cannot shame someone who has already named the thing you are holding over them. Say it first. Say it in plain light. The weapon drops. 4. Guilt can coexist with self-respect. Shame cannot. You can hold the damage and the dignity at the same time. I know because I live there. 5. Radical honesty does not give you back who you were. It hands you the clean slate of who you always wanted to be. The mask comes off. The cartoon other people drew of you stays on the page. 6. Nobody gets clean on a winning streak. 7. You have to be almost self-delusional in your forgiveness of yourself. (Go watch Chase Hughes) 8. The greatest sin was not the chaos. It was the absence. Being unavailable to the people who needed you. 9. Sustainable recovery starts with one thing: honesty with yourself. If you love an addict and want to help, that is the only door in. 10. I am only an expert on my recovery. Nobody is an expert on anyone else’s.