Every dream has a part 2 ⚔️ / ENG/日本語OK
they/them, 28
Joined December 2015
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ガーネット retweeted
Aaaaaand the second sword from the wedding set.
This has been one of the most fun swords I've had to forge in a while and I imagine you can see why :p
ガーネット retweeted
extra extra tips on how to socialize:
> you only get a 5-12 hours of real social time per week - protect them for people who energize you, not drain you
> reach out within 48 hours of meeting someone cool. the momentum dies FAST. text them before you overthink it
> create socializing rituals: monthly dinners, weekly walks, sunday calls. consistency builds depth
> be the person who initiates. most people are waiting for someone else to make plans - be that person!!
> when you vibe with someone new, don't wait for them to reach out. YOU can text first, YOU can suggest plans
> show up fully when you're together. put your phone away. present attention is the greatest gift
> check in on people even when you don't need anything. "thought of you!" texts or a memory you share - they make a difference
> try not to cancel on things last minute, if you can avoid it. show up for your friends - not only in their good times but in their hard times too
> host things!!! even just 4 people for dinner. be the person who brings people together
> invest energy in friendships that feel reciprocal. if you're always the one initiating, maybe they're not your people right now
> remember details about people's lives and follow up on them. "how did that interview go?" or "feeling better?" goes a long way
> be vulnerable. share real stuff, not just surface-level updates. that's where connection happens
> socializing requires effort and intentionality (we're in a loneliness crisis ya'll!!)
> consistency compounds. show up repeatedly and friendships deepen over time
socializing is one of the most important parts of a good life
invest in it like you would anything else that matters
you got this!!!
how to make friends as an adult:
(without the existential dread you've missed your chance)
tips:
> get off your couch
> say YES to things even if you're tired
> when you vibe with someone, ask to hang. don't wait for them to initiate!!
> try multiple communities & events to see what resonates - don't commit to just one
> show up consistently (don't flake)
> ask follow-up questions, remember the details, be vulnerable
> don't take rejection personally - people may be busy or have different schedules
> prioritize friendship like you would exercise - it requires effort & time
> once you meet a few people, host small gatherings (even 4 people for dinner), it's the fastest way to build a friend group
> iterate over time - keep meeting new people, trying new things & have fun with it!
> the power of network effects is real - you never know when someone introduces you to someone who becomes your new best friend
> give it TIME - it takes time to find your rhythm
people are waiting to meet you!!!
you got it!!!
ガーネット retweeted
There's a saying on American social media:
"Be the American that Japanese people think you are."
I'm Japanese. I've lived in Tokyo my whole life.
So let me tell you what we actually say about you, when you're not in the room.
"When someone falls down on the street, we pretend not to see. We're protecting their pride. Americans run straight at them. They don't care about the pride. They care about the knee." (Office worker, 38)
"An American will stop four lanes of traffic for a family of ducks. And then everyone in the cars claps for the ducks." (Taxi driver, 61)
"If you lend an American a pen, you will never see it again. If you need a kidney, they'll ask your blood type." (Nurse, 45)
"At kids' soccer games, they cheer when the other team's kid scores. The other team's parents look confused. Then they cheer too." (Youth soccer coach, 52, lived one year in Ohio)
"A man sneezed on a bus in Chicago. Eleven strangers said 'Bless you.' He said 'thank you' eleven times. Nobody on that bus thought this was strange." (University student, 21)
"At an airport in Texas, I watched a soldier try to pay for his lunch. The cashier said someone already had. He asked who. She said, 'Somebody who didn't want you to know.'" (Retired teacher, 70)
"American fathers cannot braid hair. But they will watch a video at midnight for an hour so their daughter's hair looks right on picture day." (Hair stylist, 33)
"I ran the Chicago Marathon once. Strangers stood in the cold for hours holding signs for people they will never meet. At mile 20, a man I'd never seen read the name off my bib and screamed it like he'd raised me." (Runner, 48)
"When Americans get lost, they ask a stranger. If the stranger is also lost, they become a team." (Tour guide, 39)
"They ask the waitress her name. And then they remember it." (Restaurant owner, 66)
And one more. From my father. He's 76. He doesn't say much about anything. This is the longest thing I have ever heard him say about another country.
"Every time something terrible happens in America, I watch the news, and I look for one thing.
The people running toward it.
There are always so many."
So, America.
You don't have to become the Americans we think you are.
We're not imagining you.
We're remembering you.