Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit) header
Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit) profile picture

Rubsomedirtonit™️

@_rubdirtonit
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Joined December 2011
  • Tweets98K
  • Following3.5K
  • Followers5.5K
775Media
Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)Photo by Rubsomedirtonit™️ (@_rubdirtonit)
Walks into confessional. Slides phone through slot.
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andrew (@AndrewChamings) profile picture
andrew
@AndrewChamings16 Jul 2019
doctor: push through the pain, I can see the head, you can do it! me: [struggling to pull on my turtleneck sweater] I can taste air
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Stu, For Real (@StuForReal) profile picture
Stu, For Real@StuForRealOct 31
Woke up possessed by all of the demons in hell again
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e l l a 🇨🇦 (@blondehotcoffee) profile picture
e l l a 🇨🇦@blondehotcoffeeOct 31
dressing up as a turtle and going trick or treating the day after halloween
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grenadine girl (@sizzylock) profile picture
grenadine girl@sizzylockOct 30
logging on to linkedin and commenting who cares on every post
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tasman (@lildorothy_) profile picture
tasman
@lildorothy_Oct 31
whenever i get horny my wife sprays me with the hose
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rrudie (@_pressuredrop_) profile picture
rrudie@_pressuredrop_Oct 31
how long does a happy meal take to kick in?
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Marcmywords (@Marcmywords2) profile picture
Marcmywords@Marcmywords2Oct 30
Just because I don’t understand it doesn’t mean I want you to explain it.
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JRGin (@GinRumMe) profile picture
JRGin@GinRumMeOct 30
Any time you can get ricotta involved is a good time.
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Taro (@Yuranagii) profile picture
Taro@YuranagiiOct 30
I saw someone at In-N-Out fill his water cup with sprite and he told me "dont be a hero" then flashed his 9mm concealed carry at me
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Horatio Quartzjixler (@Quartzjixler) profile picture
Horatio Quartzjixler@QuartzjixlerOct 29
I brought my stamp album to the strip club so these women know I like to party.
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𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓 (@MoMohler) profile picture
𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓
@MoMohlerOct 29
Maybe your baby is crying because he wants a Crunchwrap Supreme.
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barrel rolls (@barrel_rolls) profile picture
barrel rolls@barrel_rollsOct 30
for halloween i’m going to be a horny little freak
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Böb Jänke: Hönkÿ (@Bob_Janke) profile picture
Böb Jänke: Hönkÿ
@Bob_JankeOct 29
If your TV show isn't about Bigfoot, dinosaurs that still live in the Congo or UFOs I'm usually not interested
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inspector ratchet (@_hood_mona_lisa) profile picture
inspector ratchet@_hood_mona_lisaOct 29
Why does the IT manager have "semper fi" in his email signature . Sir you are resetting a password for a guy named doug
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Marcmywords (@Marcmywords2) profile picture
Marcmywords@Marcmywords2Oct 29
Fuck me like an Insurance Company.
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𝖓𝖆𝖟 (@nazzygirlxx) profile picture
𝖓𝖆𝖟@nazzygirlxxOct 6
they stop asking for ur ID once the light in ur eyes is gone
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Marcmywords (@Marcmywords2) profile picture
Marcmywords@Marcmywords2Oct 3
Good Morning Forecasters Of The Gloomy W W W
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Employee Tears (@EmployeeTears) profile picture
Employee Tears
@EmployeeTearsOct 2
If I died and went straight to hell, it would take me a week to realize I wasn't at work anymore.
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MD (@mike_daddino) profile picture
MD
@mike_daddinoOct 1
🍆🍆 of the night goes to Willson Contreras
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🤐 (@zippermouth_) profile picture
🤐
@zippermouth_Sep 25
did you know friday is still considered a real work day in some cultures?
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