Researcher & education advocate. Gym rat & whiskey connoisseur. Host of @thecoganconvo podcast. Born and raised in Milwaukee, WI. Tweets are my own.
Fairfax, VA
Joined February 2017
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Hey @Doritos - flavor blasted Cool Ranch. Sure, @GoldfishSmiles did it first… BUT every time I find that one chip caked with flavor, it makes my day. Imagine an ENTIRE bag full! I’d pay a dollar more a bag for that incredible-ness. Send me $0.10 per bag when you make it happen!
If your first response to #LisaMariePresley passing away was “oh, was she vaccinated?” - you’re a special piece of shit.
Incredible. @mtaibbi deserves all the accolades for his due diligence.
I don’t use Twitter ever… but it’s fun to scroll through the chaos. It’s clear that the amount of freaking out people are doing over @elonmusk’s takeover is indicative of being consumed by social media. Chill the F out and take your kids to a park or go for a run.
Insanity
If you haven’t been following the #DarrelBrooks trial in Waukesha, Wisconsin, you’re missing out on some hilarious entertainment from a pro se defendant.
I’ve crafted this meme template to help us all laugh through sorrow. He’ll be convicted in what will be one of the fastest jury deliberations in history - but he’s made a mockery of the court with his asinine antics. #DarrelBrooks
Hey @KETTLERliving - why don’t you answer your emails or phones? Does me paying rent for 2 years not matter enough to speak to someone about CONSISTENT negligence at one of your properties? #apartment #tenantissues
First time ever in #NewYork State, and it’s Binghamton for a drink because it’s the closest option to where I’m staying in PA. Hey Google, play #NewYorkStateofMind by @billyjoel
Let’s pass a bill to officially recognize“China” as “West Taiwan”. All formal US documents will refer to China as West Taiwan for the rest of time. #Taiwan #China #WestTaiwan
Allan Cogan retweeted
Funny. @SenToomey never called for spending caps on the war…only on the health care for veterans sickened by said wars. Interesting priorities. #PassthePactact
All #Trump needs to do when he announces his 2024 run is promise he’ll bring back the #ChocoTaco and he’ll win bigly. I’m available for hire as a political strategist.
Office holding Repubs think they’re clever making the same tired joke over and over about Biden sniffing kids and COVID. First time it’s mentioned? Funny. 52nd time at a campaign rally? Tiresome & unoriginal. You aren’t standup comedians, you’re public servants. Do your job.
Let’s be VERY clear. Rooting for the failure of our economy just to prove a point about how much you dislike the current POTUS is gross and un-american. Be critical of this admin, but don’t root for the plane to crash just to say “I told you so”. Be better. #UnitedStates
My latest blog:
“The last couple weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions for many in this country, and unfortunately our federal politicians smell that blood in the water and plan to use that anger and fear to line their campaigns’ pocketbook.“
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Gahhh I opened Twitter to doom scroll out of boredom and I sorely regret it. A cesspool of awful takes. Go play outside #SCOTUS