Zombies ate my bio

Tex-Ass
Joined November 2008
The life of a new baby. The only time it's socially acceptable to drink till you pass out and then poop on yourself.
It feels odd to be at a point in my life where getting a new washer and dryer is exciting. #NowImOld
I shouldn't have left the pumpkin spice latte in the car.
Can't decide if I'm awake right now or this is just the longest slowest dream ever.
At Pep Boys trying to decide which customer this belongs to. #noreally #badlucksteven instagram.com/p/rqEuWXmcLU/
Aaand I'm officially freaked out from the spider meal graveyard I just cleaned up. Antarctica is looking better and better.
Oooo Squishy's first band fundraiser of the year! helpourgroup.com/Facebook.as…
It's never to early to start planning a Halloween party...right? Right? Well I'm doing it anyway.
I really need that magic microwave from The Fifth Element.
Shocked by how much cleaner my living room looks now that I actually decided to do laundry.
Sanding is my least favorite thing to do today.
Now I remember why I don't get the chicken at Chipotle.
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@zzmiller87 That's how I felt when I worked at Starbucks.