Born naked, grew up, mostly wear clothes now, had kids, tax accountant, & i luv celery w/ ranch dressing & rotel dip.

Memphis, TN
Joined April 2010
One nice way to feel better about yourself is to imagine what Steve Irwin would say about you if you were a little snake he found in the desert
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Replying to @JimGaffigan
Watching this debate...
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So fun Picrewの「♡ poicon maker ♡」でつくったよ! picrew.me/share?cd=drXiT0aCX… #Picrew #_poicon_maker_
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Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary
Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary
Replying to @ADT
@adt any eta on when the app will be working?
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Please hashtag all comments about "30 Days No Killing" #murderlent. Thank you Christopher Blank.
Today in Geek History: Rule #32: Enjoy the little things. Twinkies were invented in 1930.
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My Christmas gift to the internet is these Where's Waldo pictures with Waldo photoshopped out
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Thank u @Paychex for the yummy waffles!
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Sour mood prevails on Election Day as voters lose faith in government dailym.ai/1xXmuRa#i-5416938f… via @MailOnline
They should have a class in high school where they bring in unsuccessful alumni like me to teach kids what not to do in life.
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Challon retweeted
Well crap.
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#USMNT @Jermainejunior celebrates his tying goal for the #USA. 1-1 in Manaus.
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Challon retweeted
2014 World Cup TV schedule: abcn.ws/1otlCmy + @ThisIsFusion's Soccer central: soccer.fusion.net
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