couchatron (@couchatron) header
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Fort Worth, TX
Joined July 2011
Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)Photo by couchatron (@couchatron)
couchatron retweeted
I don’t think you have a dog in this fight but if you did you would have shot it.
I’ll take @ellalangleymsic over Kacey Musgraves any day. And if I’m choosin’ Texas, I’ll take Ken Paxton over James Talarico.
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couchatron retweeted
ME AT THE START: the hat seems a bit performative ME AFTER THE SECOND LINE: the hat isn’t hardly big enough
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couchatron retweeted
crazy to think that the new rain graphics in WoW forever is probably the closest thing most of Asmongold's fanbase has come to a shower
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I just want a party that follows the Constitution. Is that too much to ask? 🤷🏻‍♂️
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Referee: “Unsportsmanlike conduct, defense, No. 1, for simulating using the restroom.”
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By popular demand, I present to you.. my magnum opus.
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couchatron retweeted
HOTEL LOBBY but the beat is Hotel California
if the migos were transported to the 70s and they still made the same music do you think they’d be the most influential group ever
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Today in the House, I introduced Articles of Impeachment against @SecWar Hegseth. The Articles outline how, among other things, Sec. Hegseth is abusing the powers of the DOD, operating without constitutional authority, and gambling with the lives of U.S. servicemen and women.
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According to an informed federal official, in the coming months the Trump administration plans to send a total of 40,000 Mark 84 and Blu-117 bombs to the government of Israel. Each bomb weighs 2,000 pounds. This appears to be the largest transfer of conventional explosive ordnance from the United States in modern history. How big is this shipment? It amounts to 40,000 tons of bombs. For perspective, the largest American air raid of World War Two was the Eighth Air Force’s attack on Berlin in March of 1945. Combined, the 2,023 Allied aircraft involved dropped about 3,000 tons of bombs. That’s 7.5 percent of what Trump is sending to Israel. That same month, March of 1945, the US Army Air Forces began the single most destructive bombing raid in human history, Operation Meetinghouse over Tokyo. More than 100,000 Japanese civilians were killed. By the end of that operation, the US had dropped 1,600 tons of bombs. That’s four percent of what Trump is sending to Israel. World War Two ended five months later, when the US dropped an atomic bomb on the city of Hiroshima. The shipment Trump is sending to Israel amounts to more than three times the destructive power of that nuclear explosion. There is no precedent for what the Trump administration is doing. Nor is there a justification. The government of Israel is not fighting World War Two, or even a war. It is engaged in periodic skirmishes with a guerrilla force in Lebanon, and it is working to exterminate an unarmed civilian population in Gaza. Neither front requires modern 2,000-pound bombs. An American-made Mark 84 has a destruction radius of half a mile. It releases a thermal wave the temperature of the surface of the sun. Within 100 feet of the explosion, rock melts and human flesh turns to vapor. The bomb collapses apartment buildings and leaves craters thirty-five feet deep. Until the war with Iran, the US military generally avoided using the Mark 84 in urban areas. It kills too many civilians. For the Netanyahu government, that’s been the upside. In the weeks after October 7, the IDF dropped nearly six hundred 2,000-pound bombs on densely populated areas in Gaza, including on more than 100 officially designated civilian evacuation zones. The slaughter was so grotesque and embarrassing that for a moment the Biden administration paused a shipment of Mark 84s. Those shipments quickly resumed under Trump. Now they’ve accelerated. It’s hard to overstate the scale of the crime the Israeli government is committing in Gaza. Over the last three years, more than a quarter-million Palestinians have been killed or wounded by Israeli forces there. The majority of them have been noncombatants: women, the elderly and tens of thousands of children. Many thousands more remain missing, presumably entombed under the rubble of 200,000 collapsed buildings. So far the Israelis have destroyed 92 percent of all homes in Gaza, and 34 of the 36 hospitals. By comparison, the 1945 Allied bombings of Dresden, now acknowledged as a war crime, destroyed about half of the city’s inhabited buildings. By any definition, what the Netanyahu government has done in Gaza is genocide. The 40,000 new bombs the Trump administration is sending will be used to do the same in Lebanon, and likely in other countries in the region. If you wanted to extend the Iran war into the indefinite future, this is exactly what you’d do. So far none of this has received public scrutiny. At some point, inevitably, it will be described in media accounts as an “arms sale.” It is not an arms sale. It is a gift, funded by American taxpayers through the Foreign Military Financing program, an arrangement designed to disguise welfare as capitalism: Congress appropriates money to the executive branch, which transfers the cash to Israel to “buy” American-made weapons, in this case from General Dynamics. Politicians claim this is a win for America. Most voters have no idea they paid for it. The bill in this case is about $3 billion. Add that to the $352 billion the US Treasury has transferred to Israel since 1951. How did this happen? The request for 40,000 new high-explosive civilian-killing bombs originated at the US Embassy in Jerusalem, which is run by Christian Zionist Ambassador Mike Huckabee and his aide David Milstein, who is the stepson of Fox News host Mark Levin. From there it moved to the State Department, where Marco Rubio enthusiastically approved it. At this point, only four more people need to sign off before the bombs ship to Israel: Senators Jim Risch and Jeanne Shaheen, the chairman and ranking member of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee; and Congressmen Brian Mast and Gregory Meeks, the top two members of the equivalent House committee. All four are committed neocons. Collectively they’ve taken millions from the Israel lobby. In 2015, Brian Mast traveled to Israel to volunteer for the Israeli military. In 2023, Mast showed up in the House of Representatives wearing an IDF uniform. It’s hard to imagine any of them hesitating before sending more free bombs to Israel. Only public outrage can stop this.
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couchatron retweeted
Hank Hill - Shook Ones (pt. II) [Mobb Deep cover]
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Congress did one and only one thing today. The House passed a bill to withhold money from universities if they don’t play nice with Israel. I voted No. It’s not proper for our federal government to coerce universities into engaging with any particular foreign country.
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couchatron retweeted
The pitch for spy kids:
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im going to bite all the wires in the data center
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couchatron retweeted
Ossoff: When he first announced the tariffs, you remember that? He called it Liberation Day, and it crashed the markets because it was clown policy. You remember that? OK, so follow me through on this. He announces the tariffs on April 2 of last year. The markets tank nonstop for like a week because it’s a disastrous trade policy, and six days into the crash, April 8, Trump buys millions in stock. I’m talking Amazon, Nvidia, Apple, Microsoft, Berkshire Hathaway, and then the very next morning, April 9, he posts on Truth Social, quote, “This is a great time to buy.” Three exclamation marks. OK, now listen to this. Three hours and 41 minutes after that post, one day after he bought millions in stock, he canceled the tariffs and triggered one of the biggest same-day rebound rallies in market history. He’s trying to get money. And you saw, now he’s offering paid subscriptions to presidential announcements, right? Just understand what’s for sale here: The sitting president’s pronouncements on war and peace and economic policy delivered first to paying customers. What an absolute crook.
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couchatron retweeted
2025 rangers 81-81 (.500) 2026 rangers 60-60 (.500) 2025 rangers thru 100 50-50 (.500) 2026 rangers thru 100 50-50 (.500)
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I’ll take “things I’ve never seen before” for 500 please.
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couchatron retweeted
line delivery of the century
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couchatron retweeted
Kroger made $527 Million in profit in 2024 selling your shopper data. Now stores are eyeing personalized pricing via digital tags + phone data to charge each person the max they’ll pay. One price for all is ending.
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BREAKING: A source close to Iranian officials says Tehran has documented a pattern of oil market manipulation tied to Axios reports and Trump administration insiders, including evidence of a $9 billion insider trading operation linked to Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff. Some of the documented timeline from the $9 billion insider profit: Between April and May 2026, a series of suspiciously timed trades in oil futures markets preceded major Iran war announcements—each tied to reporting by Axios. On March 23, approximately $500–580 million in shorts were placed 15 minutes before Trump announced he was postponing strikes on Iran. Oil dropped. On April 7, roughly $950–960 million in shorts were placed hours before Trump announced a two-week ceasefire with Iran. Oil fell around 15 percent. On April 17, around $760 million in shorts were placed 20 minutes before Iran's foreign minister announced the reopening of the Strait of Hormuz. Oil dropped. On April 21, approximately $430 million in shorts were placed 15 minutes before Trump extended the ceasefire. Oil dropped again. On May 6, nearly $920 million to $1.7 billion in crude oil shorts were placed approximately 70 minutes before an Axios scoop claimed the U.S. and Iran were near a "14-point agreement." Oil dropped 12 percent. Traders made an estimated $125 million. Iran called the report "the Americans' wish list." Previously, a senior Iranian official told investigative outlet Drop Site News that Tehran privately warned JD Vance during Switzerland talks that Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff were "abusing" negotiations—"more interested in exploiting insider knowledge to profit in financial markets than reaching a deal."
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