Cynthia

It’s been a fun October.. excited to get to Halloween. Here’s a couple fun screenshots from this month. I don’t know if Karey from Derry is real or not but, the picture on the left is from a very real man in Ohio. I’ve stayed away from my mentions and DM’s this month since these back to back days but.. I’m sure if I went in there now, I’d find some wishes for and threats of death for me. “Don’t read them.” They’re everywhere. Annnd.. They still exist though right? I just don’t know the person is in Ohio then? That’s where I’m at now. So I do get a bit fucked up when a couple days after The New York Times releases a “WE ARE ALLOWED TO AND SHOULD HATE THIS GUY” piece, a University puts a video out from their own page, indicating “we think he’s a corny creep here.” It’s a weird time. The things that get said about what my daughter and son and wife deserve are all rather wild as well. I haven’t talked to anybody about what the days were like leading up to Tennessee’s GameDay last year. There’s been some misreporting but in the ball park articles. Everybody in the “security” world was worried of a copycat incident potentially happening. GameDay was a few days out and we were the next huge gathering on a campus. The world, in front of the entire internet, just proved that we had gotten to a rather extreme place. The FBI.. alongside, Disney security, Tennessee State Police, Knoxville PD, University Police, everybody in area, all had the very same goal to protect the shit out of the area. FBI snipers were sent down there, huge presence of police.. it was a surreal moment. The conversation about the death threats I had been receiving in life was definitely a huge topic. I don’t think it was the FBI that suggested the Bullet Proof Vest, but it was certainly an idea presented by one of the security groups. We had no idea what to expect. Nobody had been in that type of situation before. Everybody wanted the best for everybody. I never felt safer and never felt more appreciative of the people that were around me that morning including the students that came out and did WAY more than they could’ve ever imagined for my soul. How’d we get here? I had to wrestle with that a bit. FBI’s sending snipers so me and the lads don’t get shot. That’s crazy. I don’t know if they teach how you’re supposed to handle these types of things in classes or something but, I was a bit rattled by the current reality of my World. I think what I realized was, when I talked about the Algerian Olympic Gold Medal boxer, and then I was HEADLINE Quoted and Captioned by platforms with rather large influence over certain communities, they left out the massive empathy part of the conversation that I had about the entire subject. I was labeled and immediately targeted. Such is life I guess.. since then, every mistake, misstep or misquote relaunches A LOT of folks into a frenzy of me being the worst person on Earth who needs to be eliminated, and they gain more and more folks who want me unalived or as they actually say it “Kirked.” I was created on the internet. I’ve been “cooked” and shit talked and criticized since I have memories. I am no where near perfect.. and there’s no way everybody is gonna agree with me but I had no idea that this is just what life would become. I’m trying my best in real time but.. I am to talk about sports and care about the future of sports. I owe everything to sports. I’m grateful as hell to do what I do. I literally try to love every minute of the incredible opportunities I get to experience but.. it’s certainly all a much different life than I could’ve ever expected. I try to give everything I have, all the time.. I am very sorry to those that despise me. The video is how I opened The Tennessee show.. I put on a USA Sports Coat and celebrated Ball. I love sports because it’s unifying. That’s all I’m ever trying to be… actually. & Connor.. I LOVE YOU BROTHER, I’m sorry I’ve brought you lads into all of this as well.