That Emperor.
Hell
Joined October 2015
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Yes, we have observed your miserable planet for quite some time.
Former Israeli space #security chief Haim Eshed has revealed that aliens from a "Galactic Federation" have been in contact with the US and #Israel for years, but humanity isn't ready to know this.
Or so he claims.
Reporting by @AaronReich
jpost.com/omg/former-israeli…
The Emperor retweeted
That debate was the worst thing I've ever seen & I was in The Star Wars Holiday Special.
The Emperor retweeted
A certain someone tried to put me in a retirement home. I didn't let her. I told her I could still rule the Galaxy, despite my advanced dark-side dementia.
Now that I think about it, Vader and I have a lot in common: Both are sons turned out to be miserable failures.
Rey told me that out of all the old guys she's met, I'm the worst. I don't see how that's true considering my competition is:
-A divorced dead guy.
-A guy who fucked off to an island and became sad and alone.
-A guy who hung around ravers for 30 years at Space-Coachella.
I bet Rey is spending Sithmas with that loser boyfriend of hers. Don't understand what she sees in that guy. Dude needs a shower and a haircut. Clearly he takes his cleaning habits from Han Solo.
I don't understand Rey's generation. Kids these days. You can't even call it the dark side of the force anymore, it's either th "good vibes" or the "bad vibes."
Okay, which of you Stormtroopers bought a 23andMe? I swear I don't have some kid or something (still pissed Vader started those rumors). I'm strong in the dark side, and my pull out game is stronger... some say it's... unnatural.
