@heatherjs

Professional Word Gardener https://xitter.cf/t.co/gRqiSrjDBE

 California, USA
Joined September 2008
  • Tweets278K
  • Following10.1K
  • Followers20K
15.2KMedia
I'm a fierce writer, in the field as the dawn draws near and everyone's mind's a blank with uncontrolled slumber.
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Damon Hunzeker
@DamonHunzeker16h
My favorite part of jury duty right now is looking around and determining who’s guilty of wearing a shirt with buttons for the first time.
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Damon Hunzeker
@DamonHunzekerOct 27
One of you broke this place again with your stupid data.
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Not Today Eric
@NotTodayEric12h
Have we ever thought to ask the daylight if it even wants to be saved.
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Dammit Bits@DammitBits12h
When you and your coworkers get emailed a question and no one is replying
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Sophie Cunningham
@sophaller14 Oct 2016
everything happens for a reason is not in the bible but "God promises to work all things to good for those who love him" is. Romans 8:28
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Jacob Morningside@The_XMas_Fart20h
If you smile as you tell idiots to fuck off...they will.
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"Words are energy, and they cast spells" Bruce Lee
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Stay synchronistic & stylistic
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Scott-Towel@scott_towel5 Dec 2019
The world is full of evil and ignorance; keep fighting the good fight, people, smile, be kind, love freely.
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Professional Word Gardener@heatherjs13 Dec 2013
No matter what happens to you in life, you still get to decide what kind of person you want to be.
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Professional Word Gardener@heatherjs13 Jun 2013
The worst kind of stupid is when you think you're smart.
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Happy Not Monday!
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Not Today Eric
@NotTodayEricOct 26
Phones should have airbags for when you drop them.
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𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓
@MoMohlerOct 25
Nine Inch Nails
Anne Erickson@AnneEricksonOct 24
Name a band where every member is perfect at what they do 🎶
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𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓
@MoMohlerOct 25
Having more money than you owe is the easiest way to get out of debt.
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𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓
@MoMohlerOct 24
Bought my Ozempic from Temu and now my bones are magnetic.
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Spaghetti and Meatballs is the opposite of Sushi.
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Scarlett Fever@WittyClittyOct 19
Just noticed I posted my last tweet on the BF’s bday that was 19 yrs older than me 😂
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Scarlett Fever@WittyClittyOct 23
Yep yep your apple pie scented candles smell delicious. But what do they taste like?
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Scarlett Fever@WittyClitty15 Oct 2018
*waving at the 2 people reading my tweets Sup sluts?
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