
ALT THINGS THAT MAKE ME FEEL EMBARRASSED Speaking, walking through any crowded room or open space, asking for help, having a body, complaining about having a body, not understanding big grad school words, understanding big grad school words, catching my reflection in a mirror, listening to the thoughts in my head, considering any moment in my past, even one second ago when I was wondering what to say here, and questioning, questioning, always questioning myself, my intent, is this push towards healing selfish, am I a selfish person for wanting the tiny drops of comfort that form on the sphere of glass I keep around my innermost self, is it a crime to be this sensitive, should I be leaving the house more, oh no, now I'm sad, is it wrong to feel sad, where is my labor going, oh no, I didn't answer that text, didn't respond to those emails, was too busy dying, convinced I was dying, whatever, the other day a stranger caught me standing out beneath the sun…

ALT Eucalyptus, 1940 Because I see three birds in the middle. Or three leaves, or three wars. Calder said, When I work on something, I have two things in mind. The first is to make it more alive. The second is always to bear in mind the balance of it. Each piece looks like my dead father’s thoughts. Crossing, uncrossing,

ALT The visual poem “FORSYTHIA” by Mary Ellen Solt. FORSYTHIA is spelled out in all caps at the bottom of the page; from each letter, vertically, one word extends upwards, a poem you can read at a ninety-degree tilt: FORSYTHIA OUT RACE SPRING’S YELLOW TELEGRAM HOPE INSISTS ACTION from the ends of each of these words extend wavy stalks of hyphens with the first letter of the originating word beaded repeatedly on it (stalks of Os coming from OUT, stalks of Hs coming from HOPE, etc.), blooming outward like an actual forsythia and taking up most of the space of the page.































