i went to the crazy people hospital for shock therapy and it didn't work good enough so i went back 2 years later and they squirted a ton of ketamine up my nose
Joined February 2015
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bird truther retweeted
[Watching AI video of two squirrels cuddling during a thunderstorm.] They are safe there, nothing can harm them as long as they have each other. [My phone dies and for the first time in my life I am confronted by my own reflection, I try to swipe away]
bird truther retweeted
if you flip your phone upside down, if looks like he's bravely carrying the weight of an entire cabinet on his back. so heroic
bird truther retweeted
They're trying to pin last night's election results on a guy named Warren Iran
bird truther retweeted
Advanced drug use teaches you that the seeming banality of sobriety is in fact one of the most sacred and profound gifts you will ever be given
bird truther retweeted
chicken wings a real mindfulness meal because you can’t look at your phone or read your book, you just have to concentrate on the wings
bird truther retweeted
To the tune of Nelly Furtado's I'm Like a Bird:
I'm not insured
I'll only drive away
I don't know where my phone is (phone is)
bird truther retweeted
when i ask 3yo not to say “shut up” he says “well the shut up man is coming tomorrow and going to say shut up to you”. kind of difficult to respond to that. if i ask who the shut up man is, he says “oh you don’t know???” and laughs at me. feels like bullying
