The internet is great! But isn’t it time for a sequel? Let’s build the internet 2 together! Looking for investors and ideas for what features to include.
United States
Joined January 2026
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Haunted Internet Alternative retweeted
Fun idea: a gun that shoots the hiccups into someone, with severity settings from 1-10. C'mon science, redeem yourself.
Our Internet 2 just received a 3.2 from Nintendo Power for graphics and sound. Hey, it’s better than RoboCop2.
Haunted Internet Alternative retweeted
Wouldn't it be great if bartenders could mix metaphors for you as well? "Evenin', Joe. I'll have an extended football reference that ends with something about stamp collecting."
Our Internet 2 and AI have been helping Haddonfield Memorial Hospital save taxpayer dollars. We identify recoverable cost/loss. Like in one case, we identified a patient named “Michael” and a Dr. Loomis who wasn’t in his network. We released Michael and saved thousands.
Our AI is used to help intake patients and track there progress throughout the recovery journey at Haddonfield Memorial Hospital.
If you are contacted in one of our chat rooms by a Becca-Regina, please report it. It’s our out-of-control AI trying to catfish you. There is no such person. If you meet it at a Best Western in Tulsa we can’t be responsible for what happens.
Imagine realizing that your JC Penney bill is due. Running down to the mall. Waiting in line at the cashier/financial specialist register to pay it. Now imagine skipping all that with online bill pay. That technology doesn’t exist yet, but the internet 2 is working on it!
Our AI is so reliable it’s used to monitor serial killers in prison 24/7. Well not while I asked it to think up this post for me, but as soon as it was complete, it was right back to monitoring.
Legally we aren’t allowed to say we are the “best” internet or that our internet “works.” But you guys are smart enough to read between the lines.
Congrats to the NBA on the start of another great season. Now imagine having the internet 2 and getting every score faxed to you lightning fast the next day.
When you log on to our internet you’ll hear a hiss and squelching. It’s the souls of the undead asking you to solve their murders. Please ignore this. It doesn’t affect download speeds and you don’t owe them anything.
Haunted Internet Alternative retweeted
Bought two turntables and a microphone on eBay and the return address on the packages was in Werritzat, Indiana.
Our sequel to the internet is providing the first ever Bluetooth cheese curds at tonight’s Green Bay SNF game. You can track their journey in real time.
During the Halloween season, we are offering Internet Two service at 30% off for occult members (a w-2 as proof necessary) and all PTA members.
