Simon Keck (@simonkeck) header
Simon Keck (@simonkeck) profile picture

Simon Keck

@simonkeck

Comedian and writer. Currently resides in Rat Town where he lives with his actions.

 Melbourne
Joined March 2009
  • Tweets3.5K
  • Following552
  • Followers854
69Media
Photo by Simon Keck (@simonkeck)Photo by Simon Keck (@simonkeck)Photo by Simon Keck (@simonkeck)Photo by Simon Keck (@simonkeck)Photo by Simon Keck (@simonkeck)
It's hard to keep things real right now and only being able to wish people 'New Year'.
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Apparently I need to use social media to spruik my podcast so I'm back in this hell hole. Yuck. Here's the stupid link everybody. goingnumbertwos.com/episodes…
Image from Simon Keck (@simonkeck)
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If you're writing a biography of Donald Trump's presidency, feel free to title it "The Emperor's New Hair". #trump
Australians all let us de-Joyce #auspol
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Simon Keck retweeted
abc730 (@abc730) profile picture
abc730@abc73023 Oct 2017
.@MrKRudd responds to @TurnbullMalcolm blaming Labor for the #NBN “train wreck”. More tonight on #abc730. #auspol @4corners
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Thank you Mr. Trump for admitting that universal health care is the better way to go. I'll be sure to quote you on the floor of the Senate.
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Simon Keck retweeted
Katya (@katya_zamo) profile picture
Katya
@katya_zamo4 Mar 2017
This is the future liberals want
Image from Katya (@katya_zamo)
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Hey, I'm starting a service called "A Dark Cuddle". When hungover af I rock up, cook eggs, give aspirin, and big spoon you. Any interest?
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Hello, I'm a grown man who wears a lanyard on my belt loop. Kneel peasant.
So this is how the world ends, not with a bang, but a Smash Mouth cover. #Inauguration
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Rage inducing. xitter.gq/SenSchumer/status/8215…
Chuck Schumer (@SenSchumer) profile pictureChuck Schumer
@SenSchumer18 Jan 2017
Betsy DeVos fails @timkaine's test at Senate hearing:

DeVos cannot answer Sen. Kaine’s yes or no questions

Sen. Al Franken discovers Trump Education Secretary nominee Betsy DeVos doesn't know the difference between proficiency and growth.
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"Pardon me shopkeep, do you know the way to Struggle Street?" "Why my lad, you're already there!" "Ah, shit."
2016 = "Now I'm not an expert, but..."
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Pay day tomorrow AND the US dollar tanking... it's an election miracle! #election2016 #USelection #AUD
It's Nov 8th in America, but for the rest of the world it's our 9/11. #USelection #election2016 #potus #usa
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Eugh, cat people are weird. Now excuse me while I put my dog's warm turds into bags.
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RT if you're in public and need to fart like a hot trumpet.
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Saw a guy brushing his teeth at a bubbler, so now I can never use one of those ever again. Cool.
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