MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) header
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MyQuestionableLife

@2questionable

Sure I’m a mom but that’s not all there is to me. I also eat tacos and order stuff from Amazon.

xitter.gq/search?f=tweets&vertical=default&q=From%3A%402questionable
Joined February 2016
  • Tweets9.3K
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  • Followers9K
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Photo by MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable)Photo by MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable)
MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Amy Dillon (@amydillon) profile picture
Amy Dillon@amydillon7 Jan 2020
The audiobook I’m listening to is a drawn out, convoluted tale of woman who works at the YMCA in a Midwestern town and her children who move in across the street from someone I went to elementary school with. (It’s a voicemail from my mom).
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
SpacedMom (@copymama) profile picture
SpacedMom@copymama13 Jan 2018
My 8yo told me her New Year’s resolution is not to step on anthills if anyone needs a lesson in realistic goal-setting.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) profile picture
Robert Knop@FatherWithTwins26 Dec 2019
*airport drinking fountain is broken* 10yo: More like h2NO right, dad? Me: *beaming with pride*
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
PawliticalSass (@pawliticalsass) profile picture
PawliticalSass@pawliticalsass26 Dec 2019
Me: Did you find the box? Husband: No Me: Did you look in the closet? Husband: Yes Me: (looks in same closet) Did you have you fucking eyes closed? Repeat everyday for infinity = Married Life
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
SpacedMom (@copymama) profile picture
SpacedMom@copymama20 Dec 2019
We’re all fighting crowds in stores and ordering truckloads of crap online and wrapping until 1 am to keep this Santa shit alive, and the people who invented it in the 1800s were just like, “Here is a single nutcracker to use as a doll, have fun”
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) profile picture
MyMomologue@MyMomologue19 Dec 2019
No one is more surprised by a present than a dad seeing what his kids unwrap on Christmas morning.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
.Mela. (@mela_shea) profile picture
.Mela.@mela_shea19 Dec 2019
He drinks a whisky drink He drinks a vodka drink He drinks a wodka drink He drinks a wadka drink He drinks a watkar drink He drinks a water drink ‘Cause he’s driving
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) profile picture
Marcy G@BunAndLeggings7 Nov 2019
toddler: can I play with bubbles? me: no, last time you spilled it toddler: I'm not gonna spill it Narrator: the toddler spilled all of it instantly, again
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Lindsay (@Rollinintheseat) profile picture
Lindsay@Rollinintheseat14 Nov 2019
Wheel of Fortune: Person who is very sensitive about wearing glasses: “I’d like to buy an ‘I,’ Pat.” Pat Sajak: “Four I’s.” Person: *bursts into tears*
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Jack D (@sharpular) profile picture
Jack D@sharpular28 Sep 2019
Good thing I bought a 55 inch 4K HD TV, so I have something to listen to while I watch my 5 inch phone.
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Wife: I thought you were going to start eating healthy? Me [reading Nutrition Facts on back of Fun-Size Snickers that it contains 3g of protein]: I've had 30g of protein for breakfast.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Burning Mom ⚡️ (@MomOnFire) profile picture
Burning Mom ⚡️
@MomOnFire23 Oct 2019
I’m less, “Meet me at the club” and more, “Who the fuck do you think you are, texting me past 9pm?!”
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Grace Segers (@Grace_Segers) profile picture
Grace Segers@Grace_Segers24 Oct 2019
Me, writing an email: I'm using an exclamation point so you know I'm friendly and excited! But now I'm using a period so that you know I'm not crazy. Here's another sentence with a period as a buffer, proving my normalness. Thanks so much!
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So many school and activity fundraisers for our kids, and not one fundraiser for the parents' sanity after dealing with all those fundraisers.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) profile picture
MyQuestionableLife@2questionable6 Apr 2018
Adulthood is basically just weeping into a pile of bills and getting distracted by your phone.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) profile picture
Mommy Cusses@mommy_cusses3 Oct 2019
Different scented candles moms can burn so everyone can tell what mood they're in like: Frazzle & Laundry Mold, No Fucks & Cleaning Everything With Baby Wipes, Stale Coffee & Bordering a Nervous Breakdown.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) profile picture
Snarky Mommy@SnarkyMommy7815 Oct 2019
Parenting involves a lot more internal screaming than I had previously anticipated.
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MyQuestionableLife retweeted
Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) profile picture
Sara Says Stop@PetrickSara14 Oct 2019
Me: Are you eating chips in the living room? 11: C’mon Mom, I promise I won’t sp- (already spilling the entire bag)-ill
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I wonder what my body would do if I gave it actual nutrients
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Being a wife and mother mostly just means somebody always wants to touch you
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