Bit-Reckless

TAX MAN: Hey you! Your W-2 is ready. Pumped for tax season. ME: Awesome, so I can file my taxes now? TAX MAN: Nope, your wife’s W2 isn’t ready yet. ME: Cool. I'll see if she knows her ADP login. TAX MAN: Hey. Your 1098 is ready. ME: Great, that’s my mortgage interest right? TAX MAN: Yep. But your loan got sold last year haha. So you’ll get two 1098s, one from each bank. ME: Yea I remember getting a letter about that at some point…that's like the 3rd time our mortgage has been sold. TAX MAN: Btw only 1 of your 1098s is ready. The other isn't. ME: Cool, so I still can't really file yet. TAX MAN: Yep. But your brokerage account 1099s will come out in mid-Feb. TAX MAN: Go look for a Consolidated 1099, or separate 1099-INT, 1099-DIV, 1099-B, 1099-R. ME: I thought 1099s were for people who were contract-based employees or gig workers? TAX MAN: Nah, 1099s are for so many things man. TAX MAN: Did you sell RSUs last year? If so, you'll get a 1099-B that shows $0 basis, so you'll want to go get a Supplemental Information document from your broker. ME: Cool, thanks for the heads up. Someone will tell me that explicitly, right? TAX MAN: Not at all. ME: Cool. What’s the difference between 1099-MISC and 1099-NEC? TAX MAN: 1099-NEC (Non-Employee Compensation) reports payments to contractors. 1099-MISC (Miscellaneous) reports other types of payments like rent, royalties, and prizes, etc. TAX MAN: They changed it a few years ago but didn't really tell anyone. ME: Why are you the way you are? TAX MAN: Nobody knows. ME: Looks like I got a 1099-K this year? TAX MAN: Did you sell something online? ME: I sold a couch on Facebook Marketplace TAX MAN: For how much? ME: $600... TAX MAN: Congratulations, you’re a business now. ME: Okay I have all my 1099s, I’m ready to file. TAX MAN: Did you check for corrected forms? ME: What? TAX MAN: Sometimes they prepare a corrected one to recharacterize income or fix mistakes. TAX MAN: They come like a few weeks later. ME: So should I wait? TAX MAN: Up to you man. TAX MAN: File now and maybe amend later? TAX MAN: Or wait, and maybe it never comes. ME: Cool. ME: Oh btw, I invested in a private company last year. TAX MAN: Ah, you’ll be getting a K-1 now LOL. ME: Great, when? TAX MAN: LOL. ME: Taxes are due in a couple months... TAX MAN: Right. ME: But the form comes in October? TAX MAN: Sometimes September if you’re lucky! ME: So what do I do? TAX MAN: File an extension and make a payment. ME: I filed an extension, but I think we owe money. TAX MAN: Yeah you'll need to pay that by 4/15. ME: But I don’t know how much I owe? ME: Because I don’t have all my forms... TAX MAN: You estimate. 100% of last year's tax or 90% of this year's tax....or else you get slapped with thousands in underpayment penalties/interest. ME: What if I make over $150,000? TAX MAN: Then you have to pay in 110% of last year's tax....or 90% of this year's tax. ME: What if I estimate wrong? TAX MAN: Penalty. ME: What if I overpay? TAX MAN: They’ll refund it eventually. ME: With interest? TAX MAN: LOL no. ME: I did everything right. ME: I have all my forms ME: I filed on time ME: I’m getting a refund TAX MAN: Congratulations ME: When will I get it? TAX MAN: The IRS says 21 days TAX MAN: It’s been 12 weeks TAX MAN: Your return is “still being processed”. ME: Can I call someone? TAX MAN: You can try. TAX MAN: They’re experiencing higher than normal call volume. ME: For how long? TAX MAN: Since 2019. ME: What if I just don’t file? TAX MAN: Prison. ME: What if I file wrong? TAX MAN: Also prison, but less likely. ME: What if my accountant files wrong? TAX MAN: Still your fault. ME: Can I just move somewhere with no income tax? TAX MAN: You can try! ME: What if I leave the country? TAX MAN: You still have to file. TAX MAN: For ten years after you renounce citizenship. ME: This is tyranny. TAX MAN: That's funny because that's actually how this whole thing started.