Carsen Smith (@CarsenASmith) header
Carsen Smith (@CarsenASmith) profile picture

Carsen Smith

@CarsenASmith

writer for @ucbcomedy / @reductress / @penguinbooks

 brooklyn, NY
Joined October 2015
  • Tweets128
  • Following482
  • Followers340
every time I see a brick wall I think why didn’t they just make one big brick? morons
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Carsen Smith retweeted
Benny Feldman (@Feldfrog) profile picture
Benny Feldman@Feldfrog13 Oct 2023
Skin is the largest organ of the human body. Until now . Introducing some sort of big purple one
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Reductress (@Reductress) profile picture
Reductress@Reductress24 Aug 2023
Why I’m Not Having Kids Because I Can’t Go Nine Months Without Riding a Rollercoaster: ow.ly/sV5c50PCBYv
Image from Reductress (@Reductress)
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The Onion (@TheOnion) profile picture
The Onion
@TheOnion10 May 2023
From The Archives: NFL Announces Jacksonville Jaguars To Play 16 Games In London Next Season bit.ly/42pzAMa
Image from The Onion (@TheOnion)
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whenever a person on the subway gets up to give their seat to a pregnant lady, I push them back down so she can take my seat instead
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whoever named this city in Canada was friggin diabolical
Image from Carsen Smith (@CarsenASmith)
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two pairs of pockets is a blessing. anymore than that and it’s a curse
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(seeing my apartment in Brooklyn as i fly into LaGuardia) sir, can you let me out here?
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I fixed the NFL
Image from Carsen Smith (@CarsenASmith)
Image from Carsen Smith (@CarsenASmith)
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criminals are so gross. who goes around just leaving fingerprints on everything? like jfc wash your hands
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Calling all cryptic lovers! Check out this amazing cover from @peturantonsson for the second book in the Area 51 Interns series, ZONED OUT, by @jamessmurray and @CarsenASmith!
Murr (@jamessmurray) profile pictureMurr
@jamessmurray25 May 2022
Here it is! The cover reveal for Book #2 of AREA 51 INTERNS: ZONED OUT! Pre-order a copy now & email proof of purchase to [email protected] & you'll get to play BINGO w/ me on Zoom in the coming weeks to win lots of prizes! Order here: amzn.to/3LOuFv7 @penguinkids
Image from Murr (@jamessmurray)
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all food should just come cut up. you know I’m not gonna eat that thing in one bite
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whoever invented wet socks was dumb
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So exciting to welcome Murr from Impractical Jokers to HES today! He and co-author, Carsen Smith, got kids excited about reading and their new book, Area 51 Interns! #HESCARES @jamessmurray @CarsenASmith
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Carsen Smith retweeted
Murr (@jamessmurray) profile picture
Murr
@jamessmurray17 Mar 2022
Amazing day visiting Hewlett HS & Hewlett Elementary School celebrating the release of AREA 51 INTERNS! Get an autographed copy here: Area51Novel.com Want me to visit YOUR school virtually or in person? Visit Area51Novel.com right now! @penguinkids @CarsenASmith
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👽Area 51 is looking for interns! In this new series by Murr from the Impractical Jokers, a group of kids work together to defend Area 51 against escaped aliens! Don't miss AREA 51 INTERNS: ALIEN SUMMER by @jamessmurray & @CarsenASmith, out now! ➡️ bit.ly/3hlR2LO
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Carsen Smith retweeted
Murr (@jamessmurray) profile picture
Murr
@jamessmurray9 Mar 2022
Our new middle-grade children's book series AREA 51 INTERNS comes out in 1 week! Get your copy here: amzn.to/3pOjVEV & join us for the virtual book launch on March 19th by visiting here: Area51Novel.com @penguinkids @CarsenASmith
Image from Murr (@jamessmurray)
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How intense does a war have to be for there not to be commercials?
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I love wide receivers’ little butts
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love the idea of a set designer watching the oscar nominated movie they worked on and ignoring Cate Blanchett’s acting to stare at the bookshelf in the back
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