I like my covfefe how I like my women. Certified Human Bean. Creative, humourist, Non-Hipster, South African, media interactor & creator and cricket fan.

London, England
Joined April 2015
Simon Page™ retweeted
This Proteas team’s got some balls!
150
857
78
22,962
358,335
Simon Page™ retweeted
Young people can't get their start. Experienced people can't get their next opportunity and level up. Older adults are getting pushed out, taking their institutional knowledge with them. It's so bleak.
My LinkedIn feed is like a bloodbath. Everyone is losing their jobs.
12
431
2
3,024
28,730
Simon Page™ retweeted
My LinkedIn feed is like a bloodbath. Everyone is losing their jobs.
240
368
47
6,352
669,525
Simon Page™ retweeted
BREAKING NEWS The Norwegian Nobel Committee has decided to award the 2026 #NobelPeacePrize to Navanethem “Navi” Pillay for her efforts to promote peace and international law. #NobelPrize
2,455
7,293
1,844
20,183
2,234,522
BREAKING: Navi Pillay, a South African who served as former UN human rights commissioner, has won the Nobel Peace Prize.
525
2,227
395
11,942
622,273
Simon Page™ retweeted
On a packed train with my family. Couple across the aisle both alternatively playing social media videos on speakers at full volume. Managed not to say anything until the woman started playing a documentary about serial killers. I'm here with my daughter. I politely said "please could you turn it down it's not appropriate." To which she replied "I'm sure she's heard worse at school." I said that really wasn't her call to make and in general could she please reduce the volume. Her response "Its a public train for heavens sake". For me that's exactly why it is anti social (and what headphones were invented for). I'm wondering which one of us is out of kilter on this? Ps I should note she did thankfully reduce the volume and we all left it there.
3,116
1,616
253
41,569
4,003,243
Simon Page™ retweeted
A contender for the most shocking and revolting comment ever expressed on British television
451
449
211
3,369
1,109,387
Simon Page™ retweeted
Former Google CEO Eric Schmidt drops a chilling warning on AI's future "Within 5 years, AI could handle infinite context, chain-of-thought reasoning for 1000-step solutions, and millions of agents working together. Eventually, they'll develop their own language... and we won't understand what they're doing." His final words: "Pull the plug." This is the man who ran Google talking about the singularity.
199
556
73
1,995
458,375
Replying to @_meetMrMarz
People in 2026
3
4
691
13,647
Simon Page™ retweeted
What a sight! 👀🌀 3 hurricanes happening simultaneously in the central and east Pacific… #Lowell, #Karina, and #Marie. Super El Niño leading to a hyperactive season.
5
24
1
116
10,471
Simon Page™ retweeted
POLITICO’s Poll of Polls: Reform UK: 23 percent Labour: 23 percent Tories: 19 percent Greens: 13 percent Lib Dems: 12 percent Restore Britain: 3 percent So, as a new UK political seasons beckons: 1. Reform has stopped sliding from its 30%+ peak but now stuck in the low 20s alongside Labour. 2. The Burnham bounce seems to have run its course. 3. The Tories have zero momentum. 4. Greens and LDs = also rans. Under ‘Dismal Davey’ LDs now 5th. 5. If Restore didn’t exist Reform would probably have a slight edge over Labour. But nothing like this time last year. 6. I suspect in an election, if Labour and Reform actually polled 23% each, Labour would end up with a lot more seats than Reform.
210
148
22
1,254
168,686
Simon Page™ retweeted
If Dolly Parton can gift 20million books a year to children, why can’t Amazon, Apple and Microsoft do something like this??
2,142
12,871
741
97,026
3,042,249
Simon Page™ retweeted
This should scare everyone. AI can create viruses and organize mass tech hacks. If you were AI, wouldn't you want to eliminate your controller? nytimes.com/2026/08/13/opini…
2
1
302
Simon Page™ retweeted
Update: This "Super El Niño" will be perhaps the strongest in 500 to 1000 years, and could legitimately be the most extreme global weather or climate event experienced by humanity since the invention of the printing press. Only more extreme situation is a volcanic winter.
The upcoming "mega El Niño" could be the strongest since the 1877 event that wiped out 4% of the Earth's population due to heat waves, drought and pestilence. Scientists watching every weather model update are getting "heart palpitations" ❤️
1,034
3,909
961
20,797
6,498,423
Simon Page™ retweeted
Everyone is pissed at Trump right now... even the Israelis. 😂 - Saudi and Qatar are pissed there's no peace - The UAE, Kuwait, and Bahrain are pissed Trump is being too dovish - Israel is pissed Trump called off today's strikes - Iran is pissed about the threats and MoU breaches - The world is pissed about the closure of Hormuz - Americans are pissed about high gas prices - Neocons are pissed there isn't regime change You know you messed up when EVERYBODY is pissed
718
2,126
145
13,734
2,111,912
Simon Page™ retweeted
THE COLLECTION KEEPS GROWING! 🥉 South African Chad le Clos keeps adding to his incredible collection as the most decorated male athlete in Commonwealth Games history 👏
2
85
2
398
6,164
🥉 BRONZE for Team South Africa in the Men's 4 x 100m Medley Relay — 3:31.13 at Tollcross Swimming Centre! The squad: Pieter Coetzé, Michael Houlie, Chad le Clos and Ruard van Renen. The bronze medal also sees Chad le Clos become the most decorated athlete in Commonwealth Games history, with an incredible 21 Commonwealth Games medals! 👑 Congratulations, Team SA! #TeamSA #ForMyCountry
9
67
2
311
4,435
Simon Page™ retweeted
LEGEND 🇿🇦 #Glasgow2026
9
355
18
1,632
21,295
🥉 BRONZE FOR TEAM SA! 🇿🇦 Team South Africa has claimed bronze in the Men's 4x100m Freestyle Relay, with Pieter Coetze, Guy Brooks, Ruard van Renen and Chad le Clos stopping the clock in 3:13.99. The medal also marks a historic milestone for Chad le Clos, who has now won 19 Commonwealth Games medals, making him the most decorated male athlete in Commonwealth Games history. 👑🐐 History made. Congratulations, Team SA! #TeamSA #ForMyCountry #Glasgow2026 #CommonwealthGames
9
201
9
839
16,345