Oh dear, Nigel. When the slogans wear thin, it’s back to the same tired routine: stoke resentment, stir division and call it leadership. Britain deserves answers. You’ve got a scapegoat and a megaphone. What a pathetic little pipsqueak you’ve become.

Tony Abbott was born in London, raised in Australia and went on to become Australia’s prime minister. If he led the Conservatives, I doubt many of those attacking Kemi’s background would care where he grew up. And to the Farage supporters posting racist filth: every slur exposes the weakness of your argument. You are not defending Britain; you are disgracing it. Wrapping bigotry in a Union Jack does not make it patriotism. It makes you a racist holding a flag.

For the racist little pricks who apparently need this explained: Kemi Badenoch was born in LONDON. She grew up abroad and returned to Britain at 16. She is now 46, married and a mother of three Disagree with her policies. Challenge her arguments. That’s politics. Treating her skin colour or Nigerian heritage as grounds to question whether she belongs here is racism. Have the backbone to own what you’re doing instead of dressing it up as patriotism. Britishness is not a whites-only club, and you miserable bigots are not its membership committee. And any politician who panders to that poison deserves contempt, whatever party badge they wear. She belongs here. Your racism belongs in the fucking gutter.

THE CIRCUS IS STILL HERE. THE AUDIENCE HAS FUCKED OFF.

64 measures, Robert? Start with a tape measure you could’ve booked a smaller fucking hall.😂

I, for one, am enjoying this tedious bastard’s humiliation. Picked a fight with the Conservatives, fancied himself the next prime minister, and now he’s addressing the furniture.

Nigel, blaming your staff because people won’t turn up for your bollocks is fucking pathetic. You want to run Britain but can’t take responsibility for a room. Even the empty chairs have had enough of your self-important bullshit.

“The workers’ party”? What a load of bollocks. A slogan isn’t a payslip, Suella. Where are the costings, who qualifies, and who picks up the bill? Workers deserve answers, not another Farage sales pitch.

How dare you lecture Ukraine about peace, Musk? you ordered Starlink coverage cut while Ukrainian forces were fighting to reclaim their own land. Want the killing to stop? Tell Putin to withdraw his troops. Demand that Russia ends its invasion. Ukraine deserves freedom, security and a peace it chooses. Spare us the sanctimonious bullshit. Put your demands to the aggressor.

PUTIN, EUROPE IS NOT YOURS TO BULLY. UKRAINE IS NOT YOURS TO TAKE.

The Nazis used “socialist” branding to attract workers while violently opposing Marxism, abolishing independent trade unions and persecuting socialists. Hitler led a far-right dictatorship. All that money, and this is the depth of your argument?

I can sleep far more comfortably with a Conservative government than gamble this country’s future on Farage’s promises. Britain needs serious government. The country is too precious for a protest vote.

Taxing ambition, punishing employers and borrowing against our children’s future is economic vandalism. Britain needs spending discipline and the backbone to back business. Kemi must hammer that case home. Conservatives should fight to make Britain richer, without apology.

“They’ve given nothing to us.” What the fuck do you want, Donald? A thank you card from a bomb shelter? A standing ovation from someone who’s lost their legs? A bereaved mother to explain why her child’s freedom deserves your support? Ukraine is fighting for its survival, and you’re talking like a petty debt collector annoyed that the victims haven’t tipped you. All that power, all that swagger, and this is the moral judgement you offer. You demand gratitude from people enduring an invasion. You deserve their contempt.

I suspect he’s not the only one coming back and we might need to put a bigger welcome mat out. Welcome home! Reform promised the earth; apparently the return ticket was the best bit. 🇬🇧