a failed everything
🌏🌈🍄 online since ‘95
Joined June 2019
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Before google maps you just had a buddy in another car who said “follow me” then proceeded to run a late yellow at the next intersection.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq retweeted
*searching around the criterion closet for around 12 minutes until i turn & look directly at the camera*
okay, just show me where tuff turf is.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq retweeted
the line behind me grows longer as cashier at the grocery store repeats my total over & over while i stare blankly off into space wondering who the first dog to reach the top of mount everest will be.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq retweeted
If you ever get attacked by a badger, throw some piranhas at it if you have some piranhas.
Of all the things to make you temporarily oblivious to the horrors around you, you chose to read this.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq retweeted
I have deleted Facebook, which means I will no longer know who died fatter than I am, or later than I'd hoped.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq retweeted
Back in my day you had to go to an Iron Maiden concert if you wanted to see a 12 foot skeleton
Hey kid covered in chocolate me and wife saw while on holiday ten years ago, we still talk about you.
Bummer T. Vibes, Esq retweeted
Bought a couch today that cost more than my first car. This is fun. Everything is fine and good and fun.