I think relationships give ppl social credibility that single ppl have to establish individually. Being chosen is treated as evidence that you're desirable, stable, capable of commitment, etc. So ppl outsource their sense of adulthood to someone else's willingness to be with them

I think calling small acts of care the “bare minimum” also makes us less attentive to the person doing them. We become so concerned w/ whether we're entitled to something that we stop noticing the thought behind it & being taken for granted is how a lot of tenderness disappears.