Jami Conley

I’m perplexed by leaders who grow harsher, more legalistic and less compassionate in their older years. It seems, at least to my understanding, to go against the grain of aging for a person walking with the Lord. Unless there is hardness of heart caused by resentment, bitterness, jealousy, perversity or the like, the aging grow in holiness marked by humility and gentleness. Fact is, we’ve seen too much sin, weakness and failure in ourselves and received too much grace and mercy to be otherwise. Think, for example, of the scene in John 8 where people are ready to stone the adulterous woman. Jesus says, OK, let the one without sin cast the first stone. And you know how the story goes. They drop those stones, one by one, and walk away starting with the older ones. Why? Because they know the length, breadth and depth of their own sins and failures. Think of James 3:13 where he draws a direct connection between wisdom and gentleness, the latter indicating not powerlessness or eroding convictions but power and conviction submitted to the control and wise restraint of the Holy Spirit. Gentleness is also fruit of the Holy Spirit. Jesus described himself as gentle. Though he was utterly sinless, he was deeply compassionate, having been tempted in all ways. Harshness, extremism and a condemning spirit are ill-fitting to the aging in Christ. I have no desire to name names or cast stones or I’m no different from those I find baffling. I just want to say we’re greatly helped by an honest and frequent examination of our own hearts to see if they are growing in tenderness and compassion or in the hardness of unresolved character issues.