Timekeeper of Whatever (@spaghetti) header
Timekeeper of Whatever (@spaghetti) profile picture

Timekeeper of Whatever

@spaghetti

The funko to the soy man is like a sheath of a knife

 Brooklyn, NY
Joined December 2011
  • Tweets51.3K
  • Following691
  • Followers3.5K
2.9KMedia
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This has been a tough year for cataloguing fun tweets because this place has become a morass of insane bullshit, which has always been the case, but it’s now lacking a certain whimsy. Nevertheless, my FAVE tweets of 2024:
Timekeeper of Whatever (@spaghetti) profile pictureTimekeeper of Whatever@spaghetti31 Dec 2023
It is once again that time of the year. Here are my fave tweets of 2023:
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
greg (@gurreggg) profile picture
greg@gurreggg23h
niggas will claim they communist but don’t clean the dookie marx off they lenin sheets
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Really hate the term “Michigander” they need to work on a new one
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Anyone who thinks this should be put a watchlist
Philip Klein (@philipaklein) profile picturePhilip Klein
@philipakleinNov 2
So I finally caught "You Can See Everything" last night and I never would have predicted that in a documentary about one of the worst corporate fraudsters in history and her psychopath husband that the person who would come out worst would randomly be Amanda Seyfried.
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
Cassie Pritchard (@hecubian_devil) profile picture
Cassie Pritchard
@hecubian_devilNov 2
The right-wing Anakin posting does make a lot of sense as it combines many of the Right’s core preoccupations: getting groomed; killing your wife; working for an insane, octogenarian tyrant; being hated by your children; losing and dying
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Who thought it was a good idea to put this guy’s disgusting mug in front of a camera?
Chris Menahan 🇺🇸 (@infolibnews) profile pictureChris Menahan 🇺🇸
@infolibnewsNov 2
60 Minutes' Ross Douthat makes a fool out of himself trying to claim the Saudi Lobby is similar in power to the Israel Lobby. "[$33 million] was spent by AIPAC [against me]," Abdul El-Sayed counters. "Can you point to any other spending [like that]?!"
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British people will google stuff like "whys me arse mingin" or "whys me arse pure hummin of shite"
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
Ryan Grim (@ryangrim) profile picture
Ryan Grim
@ryangrimNov 1
The Rogers spokesperson you see starting this press conference is Abby Ronson. She is currently registered as a foreign agent for the state of Israel, according to @DropSiteNews reporting today
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
chris oldman © (@AlsikkanTV) profile picture
chris oldman ©@AlsikkanTVNov 1
“In cinematography, the ‘Dutch Angle’ is often used to portray a character’s psychological unease and may represent madness or their unstable mental state.”
Haley Stevens (@HaleyforMI) profile pictureHaley Stevens
@HaleyforMINov 1
I am endorsing Mike Rogers for the United States Senate today.
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Heidi you would love Caria Manor
The Hollywood Reporter (@THR) profile pictureThe Hollywood Reporter
@THRNov 1
Heidi Klum poses on the carpet at her annual Halloween party in NYC
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
Luka Dončić (@lukadoncic) profile picture
Luka Dončić
@lukadoncic19 Mar 2013
when you lose the one you wonted
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
𝓛𝓾𝓬 (@ChevalierRequin) profile picture
𝓛𝓾𝓬
@ChevalierRequinOct 30
Incredible
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I lib out so hard when I see this kinda stuff. So awesome
FactPost (@factpostnews) profile pictureFactPost
@factpostnewsOct 29
Fox: Why are you here this morning? Trump rally attendee: Well, in the late 70s, I was a little too young to go to South America for the Jonestown Massacre. But this is as close as I'll ever get, so that's why I'm here. There's nothing like seeing a cult right up front.
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That’s Murda Beatz????
NFR Podcast (@nfr_podcast) profile pictureNFR Podcast
@nfr_podcastOct 28
A$AP ROCKY 🚨 FKA TWIGS MURDA BEATZ DA BEST OF ME (DONT BE DUMB - DISC 2) FRIDAY. • NFR Exclusive
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“Obviously sympathetic” in this context is almost an oxymoron. If it was obvious, then you’d think one would just say “supports.” But no, the more amorphous “sympathies” are alleged—undergirded by very much not obvious, perceived allusions to sympathy.
Samnite (@LastPopo) profile pictureSamnite@LastPopoOct 29
Replying to @crackitydimes @ImNotOwned
There’s mildly antisemitic and then there’s obviously sympathetic to Islamic terrorism.
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Wait, she’s married to @mattyglesias ???
Chad Livengood (@ChadLivengood) profile pictureChad Livengood
@ChadLivengoodOct 28
SCOOP: Haley Stevens' fiancé says he's voting for Mike Rogers for Senate over Abdul El-Sayed detroitnews.com/story/news/p… via @nannburke & @detroitnews
Haley Stevens' fiancé says he's voting for Mike Rogers for Senate

Haley Stevens' fiancé says he's voting for Mike Rogers for Senate

Jason Turkish, a Democratic mega donor, described his decision to back Republican Mike Rogers over Abdul El-Sayed as "putting country before party."

detroitnews.com
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Why are there so many different font sizes here
Crazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics (@AssLatam) profile pictureCrazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics
@AssLatamOct 28
During his self-imposed exile in the US, former Brazilian presidential candidate Flávio Bolsonaro makes a statement in which he proclaims himself President-elect of Brazil.
Image from Crazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics (@AssLatam)
Image from Crazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics (@AssLatam)
Image from Crazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics (@AssLatam)
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Last Hail Mary before he is put under The Hague
Benjamin Netanyahu - בנימין נתניהו (@netanyahu) profile pictureBenjamin Netanyahu - בנימין נתניהו
@netanyahuOct 28
הליכוד: הבחירות במדינת ישראל נגנבו על ידי מפלגות ערביות שתומכות בטרור ובחיסול המדינה היהודית באמצעות עבירות פליליות חמורות של שוחד, איומים, אלימות, זיופים ושימוש בתוכנות אסורות להמרצת מצביעים. מפלגת הליכוד מעבירה למשטרה, לשב״כ ולוועדת הבחירות מאות עדויות וראיות על גניבת בחירות בקלפיות ערביות רבות- אלפי מעטפות עם כסף מזומן ופתקי רע״ם, איומים ואלימות כלפי חברי הקלפי, ריבוי מצביעים מאחורי הפרגוד, הצבעות בזהות כפולה, פערים בין מספר המעטפות למספר המצביעים, שימוש בתוכנות המרצה אסורות ועוד. אנו דורשים מהמשטרה ומהשב״כ חקירה יסודית בגין גניבת הבחירות על ידי המפלגות הערביות ומיצוי הדין עם העבריינים. אנו דורשים מוועדת הבחירות התייחסות מיידית לחקירת העבירות הפליליות הללו שפגעו באופן קיצוני בטוהר הבחירות בישראל ובתוצאות הבחירות. זו פגיעה חמורה בדמוקרטיה הישראלית ובזכות הבחירה של אזרחי ישראל. גופי האכיפה מוכרחים לפעול ביד קשה ובאופן מיידי.
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
Nouveau Niche (@whatthehellsure) profile picture
Nouveau Niche@whatthehellsureOct 26
They’re making the Flock Cameras in Bushwick shoot on 35mm
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You do not know ball
Justin Morissette 👊🏻 (@JustinMoris) profile pictureJustin Morissette 👊🏻@JustinMorisOct 26
Highlight of the aural assault that was Alex G’s set opening for Phoebe Bridgers was when I was so certain it had to be over, that surely he must be taking the mic right now to say thank you good night, and what he actually said was “We have five songs left.”
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Timekeeper of Whatever retweeted
𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚 (@beyoncegarden) profile picture
𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚
@beyoncegardenOct 26
OH HE ATE HIM UP SO BAD LMFAOOO😭😭😭
𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚 (@beyoncegarden) profile picture𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚
@beyoncegarden25 May 2024
what's the nastiest read you've ever seen someone give😭
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