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The Nation's Trusted Premium Parody #News source. All tweets unauthorised, unaffiliated, and unhelpful.

Singapore
Joined August 2010
Breaking: Elections Department investigating reports of unauthorised campaign poster by a 5-man GRC team ahead of nomination day. The poster has been found in schools islandwide. #GE2020 #SingaporeVotes #Soaper5GRC
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Public service announcement: Safe distancing rules have kicked in, and they’re enforceable by law. Please report any offenders. Stomp:
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Yes but what about this new Diamond Princess country you made up
DEBUNKED: The image of a tweet from CNA stating schools in Singapore are closed due to the novel coronavirus outbreak is fake cna.asia/2Uw4Ngt
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"What do we say to the online hordes clamouring for Tharman to be the next PM?" @chuanjin1:
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New Joker movie origin story begins with CNA journalist walking 36km for his job. (The video is actually really good, go see: xitter.gq/channelnewsasia/status…)
What’s it like walking across Singapore, from Chinese Garden to Coney Island? We hit NParks' new Coast-to-Coast trail - all 36km of it cna.asia/2uLORIW
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Breaking: @AP reveals mind-blowing secret pronunciation of PM @leehsienloong’s name, Lee Ha-zee-en Lahng
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DPRK running guard 1: "Are we following this all the way to the Istana?" Guard 2: "No at Orchard take MRT to Dhoby Ghaut"
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Is this what Obama has been up to
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#DidYouKnow: the new Challenger flagship store is also “of Bugis descent”. (As is Cold Storage, and a bunch of eateries.)