It was fun when the little Blue Bird was in charge. Good Bye X-Twitter! Find me at @fuzzyapril.bsky.social
In a SIM.
Joined April 2021
- Tweets2.8K
- Following469
- Followers97
- Likes4.1K
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Alaska Airlines got final approval from the Department of Transportation to buy Hawaiian Airlines.
It's a win/win. Alaska's customers can now use airmiles to go to Hawaii, and Hawaiians customers can use also use airmiles to go to Hawaii.
#sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
An 80 year old woman's birthday cake went up in flames after family members covered it in "never blow out" candles.
Turns out, it was a "cremation reveal" party.
#sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
The Campbell Soup company is now going by The Campbell Company. It's like when your grandpa decided he wanted to be called "Ace" after one too many bingo nights. #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
In last night's debate, Trump claimed immigrants are "eating the dogs." In other news, my dog just updated its LinkedIn profile to "indoor cat." #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
In last night's debate, Trump kept telling people how immigrants are "EATING DOGS!" Now Joey Chestnut is wondering, "Did he mean me?" #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Bill Gates, cofounder of Microsoft, says he is kept up at night by the threat of a world war or another pandemic. No word, yet, if his association with Jeffrey Epstein also keeps him up at night. #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
A 5.1 earthquake hit today, and my cat just stared at me as if to say, "You're worried? I knock things off the shelves for fun. Welcome to my world." #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
September 7th is “National Beer Lover’s Day,” or as I call it, "Brett Kavanaugh Day." #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Vegas is teaming up with L.A. to build an art museum. Finally, a place where velvet Elvis paintings can hang alongside portraits of dogs playing poker. #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Disney+ is reimagining "Phantom of the Opera" for a YA audience. Brace yourself for the Phantom's emotional ballad about being ghosted by his high school crush. #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Cristiano Ronaldo becomes first man to score 900 career goals.
Gay men everywhere are like, "okay, goal queen. I have like, maybe, 3 career goals right now, and that's a lot to manage."
#sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Cristiano Ronaldo becomes the first man to score 900 career goals. Even more impressive, none of those balls, Tom Brady, were deflated. #SketchSchoolJokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
After 3 months, Boeing’s Starliner is set to return home from the International Space Center. But without its 2 person crew. They moved out after they were married on the reality show "At First Sight." Now they're looking for a bigger place with extra space. #SketchSchoolJokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
So, 10,000 hotel workers are on strike, leaving travelers to fend for themselves. It's like the ultimate escape room challenge: can you find clean towels, a working coffee maker, and your phone charger before checkout time? #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Elon Musk defies Brazil’s X ban by allowing access to the app through his satellite provider Starlink. Now that X is finally back up in Brazil, Musk can refocus his time on Tesla, SpaceX, and watching James Bond die. #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Vanna White was “very scared” of whether she and new host Ryan Seacrest would have chemistry on ‘Wheel of Fortune’. But her fears were put to rest when, on the first day, Seacrest bought her vowels. #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
Michigan has surpassed California as the nation’s top cannabis market. Also Governor Gretchen Whitmer claims her state has also outpaced California in another area: The largest producer of governors who’ve been passed over for Vice President. #SketchSchoolJokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
In other news, after Musk Ignores Court Orders, Brazil Bans X . The real story here is that after so many people have used X to cancel others, X is finally getting a visit from Ms. Karma Comes Around. #sketchschooljokes
nytimes.com/2024/08/30/world…
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
US Open quarter-finalist Jessica Pegula says she finds it "annoying" and "outrageous" that people assume she has a butler because her father is a multi-billionaire. Pegula went on to say, “indentured servitude is much cheaper than having staff.” #sketchschooljokes
April Barnett - Anti War/Pro Peace retweeted
A man who was stung in the testicles by a scorpion while staying at a Las Vegas hotel says that his sex life has been ruined. The man went on to say it’s going to be years before he trusts another scorpion again. #sketchschooljokes