⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace) header
⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace) profile picture

Churchman, draughtsman, aesthete, pedant. Often tiresome, sometimes insufferable, never dull.

Valley Forge, PA
Joined January 2015
Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)Photo by ⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ (@askWallace)
No matter how screwy this app gets, I fully intend to stick around for the long haul. That’s what we do.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
today, November 7, 2026, the shooting of President William McKinley is the exact halfway point of America's history as an independent nation. it happened 45,718 days ago, and 45,718 days after the Declaration of Independence was signed
Replying to @jfkplus60
FLASH: President McKinley has been shot! The man's handkerchief concealed a revolver, which he fired twice into the President's torso. McKinley turns pale, swoons, and is caught by his personal secretary, George Cortelyou.
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This - as someone who enjoyed reading growing up - is fundamentally correct. You have to let people develop their own interests, even if they may not be things that interest you, and sometimes that means pointing them in the right direction and getting the hell out of the way.
I am getting profoundly sick of women (many of whom possess advanced degrees in subjects that require several years of graduate study) who hate stwelve-year-old boys, explaining to the rest of civilization how we need to relate to them. Now, before anyone gets carried away, I am also a woman. I have been one for more than fifty years. I was never a boy. I am a tomboy, which means I spent a fair amount of my childhood doing things that would cause a modern Gender Studies department to call an emergency faculty meeting. The difference is that I don't have a PhD in anything, (worthless or otherwise) so I haven't developed the intellectual confidence necessary to believe I know absolutely everything. I'm kind of dumb that way. For example, I have this radical theory that boys should be encouraged to read whatever the hell interests them. For a great many boys, this will be... (Please sit down. This may be upsetting.) BOY STUFF. Sports! Soldiers! Hunting! Explosions! Airplanes! Tanks! Dinosaurs eating other dinosaurs! Some boys will prefer chemistry or astronomy. Some will love cooking. Some will be fascinated by fashion. Some will want to read about ballet, and some will want to read about a Sherman tank driving through a ballet recitle while firing its main gun at a home ec class. THIS IS FINE. Nobody is proposing that we issue every male child a football, a rifle, and a copy of The Art of War at birth, then arrest him if he expresses an interest in soufflés. We're suggesting that if you want boys to read, it might help to give them books about things they actually want to read about. They probably know what interests them better than the woman who spent 8 yearas at university, and written tons of papers about how awful men and boys are. I realize this is a controversial educational theory, requiring another $400 million in federal research grants. But here's something else I've noticed. Whenever the subject of boys comes up, an astonishing number of women immediately begin explaining how boys need to be understood, engaged, reimagined, reconstructed, and possibly returned to the manufacturer for a firmware update. You know who might have some useful insight into what it's like to be a boy? MEN. Yes! MEN! Those strange, hairy creatures who were (in most cases) ACTUALLY BOYS at one point! I know. It's an outrageous suggestion. Now, being a woman, I don't have firsthand experience with boyhood. But I've discovered this remarkable intellectual technique called LISTENING TO PEOPLE WHO DO. It's fascinating. You ask someone about their experiences, and then (and this is the really important part) you SHUT UP long enough to hear the answer. Sometimes you even learn something. One thing I've learned is that a great many boys enjoy traditionally masculine things. Not all boys. Not every boy. Not every minute of every day. But enough boys that pretending otherwise requires a level of deliberate obtuseness normally associated with government procurement. Thank you for attending my TED Talk. That'll be $650. I'm kidding. It's free. I haven't figured out how to get a university to pay me for stating the obvious. I'm not a Democrat anymore. But seriously. We've spent two generations "rethinking how we engage with boys." Judging by the educational and social problems facing young men, I think we're entitled to ask whether some of that rethinking has been an enormous, expensive failure. Maybe it's time to stop treating ordinary boyhood like a defective social construct requiring professional intervention. Maybe it's time to let Grandpa, who was once a boy himself, take the kids fishing. Or shooting. Or teach them how to rebuild a carburetor, throw a football, or make something useful with their hands. And if one of those boys wants to learn ballet or bake a cake instead? LET HIM. MAYBE THEN we can find someone (most likely a woman) to help him otu. That's the entire point! Give boys opportunities. Give them books. Give them good male role models. Let them discover their interests without turning every preference into an ideological emergency. And for the love of everything holy, STOP ACTING LIKE ACKNOWLEDGING THAT BOYS AND GIRLS OFTEN HAVE DIFFERENT INTERESTS IS SOME KIND OF CRIME AGAINST HUMANITY. I'm not suggesting women have nothing useful to contribute to raising or educating boys. I'm suggesting that perhaps, just perhaps, we should spend a little less time lecturing men about what boys need, and a little more time asking men what being a boy was actually like. It's a crazy idea, I know. But after fifty years on this planet, I'm beginning to suspect that the people who insist they know the most about boys are frequently the people least interested in listening to them.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
Its the same at Christmas. People want a mini version of Carols at Kings. The classic readings with carols everyone knows.
It really is. One of the most frequently heard complaints by people who turn up in churches that use the unknown modern Lord’s Prayer is that it’s a totally in-club thing - absolutely exclusionary of anyone not in the niche modernist liturgical club.
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“The Steelers”
The most jarring experience I've had with this was Philadelphia I'm a midwestern rube, had never been out East. Had obviously learned about Philly from history class - the city of the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, you know, Nic Cage in National Treasure. Philly cheese steaks, the Steelers. I spent a weekend there - did some grocery shopping, went to bars, went out to eat, in various parts of the city - and the only actual Americans I saw were the people I was staying with. The only white people I saw were the Romanians at the church I went to that sunday. I basically had Paris syndrome, what I saw was so out of line with what I was expecting. What I had assumed was a great American city was actually a dilapidated foreigner infested shithole. Even the mansions were run down. Apparently this is the future of America.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
For reference, HMS Hood engaged the Bismarck at 12 miles and was sunk by direct enemy fire at ~9 miles.
Ready the weapons. Man your battle stations. Get birds in the air. And then? Stand ready and watch the enemy turn around.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
Haha, can’t believe this guy actually believes these fairy tales
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
This is a hornbook, a piece of paper glued to a board that was given to kids to quite literally learn their ABCs. The first text anyone learned to read fully was the Lord’s Prayer. To dispose of a prayer so deeply ingrained in popular culture with no good reason is deeply unwise.
It really is. One of the most frequently heard complaints by people who turn up in churches that use the unknown modern Lord’s Prayer is that it’s a totally in-club thing - absolutely exclusionary of anyone not in the niche modernist liturgical club.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
The acceptable amount of time to be trapped inside a train station is 0 minutes
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
We need to reclaim November from the commercial Christmas-pushers. Here's some suggestions. 1st: All Saints 2nd: All Souls 5th: Bonfire Night 11th: Remembrance Post Remembrance: Martinmas Last Sunday before Advent: Stir up Sunday 30th: St Andrew's Day
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
America achieving an unheard of level of global cultural hegemony only to give it up because a bunch of 75 IQ small business owners didn’t understand soft power has to be one of the greatest imperial self owns in human history
Even Iranian people who I’ve spoken to/DM’ed who still support “Iranian Islamic Revolutionism” on a personal level basically admit that their ideology is dead in Millenials and Zoomers and everyone under ~40 in Iran is essentially an atheist who watches all the recent ‘decadent Western movies’, anime and Vizieslop Hazbin Hotel shows essentially. This is why Trump attacking Iran for 1srael is retarded even from a “U.S. national interests geopolitical realism” perspective btw. The Obama/Kerry doctrine of essentially buttering Iran up so they would eventually ‘integrate into the world system’, drop the ‘Islamic’ and just become “Republic of” - Was essentially working. Trump doing what he did disgraced the ‘reformists’ and now despite their ideologies general unpopularity with the youth, the ‘hardliners’ are now still basically in charge.
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We’re going to have to bail these people out of *yet another* disastrous Continental entanglement within the next decade or two, aren’t we…
Seen on LinkedIn - a potential Army Reserve applicant venting their frustration about how it will take over 2 years from their initial application to attending AOSB.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
Stumbled upon this 1800s painter Luigi Premazzi who did these insane paintings of his mansion The medium? FUCKIN WATERCOLOR HOLY SHIT HOW
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
My pet theory is Boomers wound up the the way they did bc their dads all had PTSD managed with heavy alcoholism
America after WW2 was fucking crazy, like you find some 23yo who had to rip a guy's trachea out with his fingers on Guadalcanal and you just hand him an apron and big goofy glasses and say "Ok, youre the hardware store guy now, have fun, sell some Carpenters pencils, be normal".
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
The church needs to be in a place where it is (as a senior courtier advised me on a past *big* event) “set to print”.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
this might genuinely be the greatest photograph in human history. the delicate balance between light and darkness, the peaceful beauty of the natural world, and the unsettling realisation that something ancient and deeply unnatural is always watching through the trees
Sir, this is a national park, not a portal to the underworld. Photo of a bobcat pretending to be a tree demon at Joshua Tree National Park.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
He does not know how the chicago manual of style works
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By making an Act of Reparation, as the Faith teaches. Not by whacking people’s heads off.
Replying to @ManDiMaurice
How will you feel if your holy ground was violated
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This is correct, and I’m tired of pretending otherwise. VoIPslop is a SCOURGE.
boomers learned to talk on the phone when it was all over copper, there was zero lag, the audio quality wasn't compressed to shit they give millenials and zoomers this disgusting VoIP slop w/ 2001 teamspeak audio and 500ms lag and wonder why we don't make calls
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
Build as if you’re building for the ages, not just the eight years you may be planning to inhabit this place. Leave good traces of who you are and what you stand for in the places you build, and see to it that they lift both your spirits and the spirits of those who come after.
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⚓️ Parish Nuisance™️ retweeted
Build as if daylight were your first light, and artificial light was reserved for the night. The windows you’ll add will also be great for cross-ventilation in warmer months, and everything in rooms with light on two sides (including the people) will be more beautiful.
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